In this chapter, some progress was made with Boo. Lori was very anxious about Valentine's day, so she had brought in many decorations for the classroom, as well as some valentines for Torey, Tomaso, Boo, and Claudia. When Torey asked if she should put the cards in a folder until it was actually Valentine's Day, Lori insisted that everyone read their card now, and that her dad would buy her "store valentines" for the actual day when she had to give them to her general education classroom as well. Boo's card was actually more of a book of pictures. Lori had cut out pictures of animals in magazines and drawn some in as well, When Boo was looking through it, he pointed at a dog and said, "Doggie". This was extremely exciting for everyone in the room, and so they pointed out other animals. Tomaso would point to an animal and correct Boo until he got it right, and then move onto the next one. Boo was actually able to identify animals when asked by the others, and Lori was so happy she said "I feel like laughing and crying all at the same time." Of course, this eventually came to an end and Boo went back to doing what he normally did, not responding to anyone's questions and remaining in his own world. Lori was so disappointed because she thought she had finally "fixed him". Torey reassured Lori and told her that it was because of her gift that Boo had spoke to them.
I think this chapter was a good example of small steps of progress. Sometimes we are going to feel like there has been vast improvement in a student, and the next minute things will have gone back to normal. I think it is important to remember how special these MOMENTS are, even if they are not necessarily built upon right. The fact that they even happen means we are doing something right, and we should not always feel disappointment when things don't remain perfect.
Tuesday, November 27, 2012
Chapter 15
Torey decides to talk to Claudia about her plans for the baby. She ends up overstepping her boundaries and asking what Claudia is going to do with it, and if she had considered putting the baby up for adoption. This makes Claudia upset with Torey and she wonders how Torey could even suggest something like that. She thinks that everything will be okay and that someone will always have time to help with the baby. Claudia also said that the baby was going to fix everything. Then asks Torey why she even cares, because nobody else does, and that everyone in Torey's classroom are just "somebody else's kids", which is where I assume the title of this book came from. This was an interesting conversation because Torey knew she had overstepped and made Claudia feel bad, but she also wanted Claudia to realize how things would really be if she kept the baby, and that the chance of her dropping out of school was becoming higher and higher.
I think this is a tough call as far as talking to students and giving them input on certain topics. This is probably something I would talk with them about, but I doubt I would give them any input on what to do in certain situations. For my safety and to not hurt their feelings it is not really my place to put my opinion in their lives. Although there are times where input might be helpful, this would probably be one of those times that a student-teacher relationship isn't really close enough to put my own ideas towards.
Lori brought Torey a drawing she made, and had a beautiful quote. She was talking about how it didn't come out perfect like she was thinking, and Torey told her not to say that and that it was better than any old photograph. That's when Lori said, "What I was thinking about was: It is perfect. Not the part you see but what's inside you. In my head, I could see this bird perfect. And that's sort of enough for me to like this picture even though it isn't really very perfect. Because...well, because I kind of know it could be..." (pg. 155). Then she said "Things never really are perfect, but inside you, you can always see them perfect, if you try. That makes things beautiful to me".
It is amazing the profound things children can say, not even knowing how big of an impact their innocent words can mean to those around them.
I think this is a tough call as far as talking to students and giving them input on certain topics. This is probably something I would talk with them about, but I doubt I would give them any input on what to do in certain situations. For my safety and to not hurt their feelings it is not really my place to put my opinion in their lives. Although there are times where input might be helpful, this would probably be one of those times that a student-teacher relationship isn't really close enough to put my own ideas towards.
Lori brought Torey a drawing she made, and had a beautiful quote. She was talking about how it didn't come out perfect like she was thinking, and Torey told her not to say that and that it was better than any old photograph. That's when Lori said, "What I was thinking about was: It is perfect. Not the part you see but what's inside you. In my head, I could see this bird perfect. And that's sort of enough for me to like this picture even though it isn't really very perfect. Because...well, because I kind of know it could be..." (pg. 155). Then she said "Things never really are perfect, but inside you, you can always see them perfect, if you try. That makes things beautiful to me".
It is amazing the profound things children can say, not even knowing how big of an impact their innocent words can mean to those around them.
Chapter 14
This was a relatively short chapter, that discussed two different incidents.
The first incident had to do with Lori, whom Torey thought was acting differently lately. She wasn't quite able to figure out exactly what was different, but she knew that Lori wasn't as jolly as she usually was. They had begun playing a card game with letters, which Lori had grown addicted to (it was basically "Go Fish" with different letters of the alphabet). Torey realized that as time had gone on, she was scared of letting Lori lose, so she had been purposely throwing the games for a long time. One day she was thinking about this, and Lori tried to match a card that wasn't actually a match. When Torey told her this, it made her very upset. Torey ended up winning, and Lori threw a huge fit, saying that the game was the only thing she was ever able to win at, and that Torey basically took that away from her.
I think sometimes it is difficult to find a balance between offering help and giving too much help, to the point where it really isn't helping the child but just a way for the teacher to deny that things aren't really getting much better. Torey talked about how she was in denial about Lori because she only wanted her to be happy, and deep down she knew that things were always going to be difficult for her.
Torey met with Claudia's parents to talk about her academic plan, and Claudia's father seemed very concerned about the classroom and the students Claudia is interacting with. He makes a comment about how Boo is a colored-boy, another about how Tomaso is a migrant child, and also makes negative comments about how sometimes Claudia helps with the other children. Torey realizes that she must be very careful in dealing with this situation. She does not want Claudia's father to pull her out of school and get a tutor because she feels that the last thing she needs is even more isolation, but she is also afraid that Claudia's father will find a reason to sue her.
This brings about another issue all teachers should be aware of, which is the communication with parents and the fact that not all parents are going to think everything the teacher does is the perfect choice. We must learn to make compromises when it comes to the family's belief system, and to deal with things in a mature way. I know that sometimes it will be hard for me when I disagree with some parents' opinions, but I have to continue to try and work with them and come up with the best plan for their child.
The first incident had to do with Lori, whom Torey thought was acting differently lately. She wasn't quite able to figure out exactly what was different, but she knew that Lori wasn't as jolly as she usually was. They had begun playing a card game with letters, which Lori had grown addicted to (it was basically "Go Fish" with different letters of the alphabet). Torey realized that as time had gone on, she was scared of letting Lori lose, so she had been purposely throwing the games for a long time. One day she was thinking about this, and Lori tried to match a card that wasn't actually a match. When Torey told her this, it made her very upset. Torey ended up winning, and Lori threw a huge fit, saying that the game was the only thing she was ever able to win at, and that Torey basically took that away from her.
I think sometimes it is difficult to find a balance between offering help and giving too much help, to the point where it really isn't helping the child but just a way for the teacher to deny that things aren't really getting much better. Torey talked about how she was in denial about Lori because she only wanted her to be happy, and deep down she knew that things were always going to be difficult for her.
Torey met with Claudia's parents to talk about her academic plan, and Claudia's father seemed very concerned about the classroom and the students Claudia is interacting with. He makes a comment about how Boo is a colored-boy, another about how Tomaso is a migrant child, and also makes negative comments about how sometimes Claudia helps with the other children. Torey realizes that she must be very careful in dealing with this situation. She does not want Claudia's father to pull her out of school and get a tutor because she feels that the last thing she needs is even more isolation, but she is also afraid that Claudia's father will find a reason to sue her.
This brings about another issue all teachers should be aware of, which is the communication with parents and the fact that not all parents are going to think everything the teacher does is the perfect choice. We must learn to make compromises when it comes to the family's belief system, and to deal with things in a mature way. I know that sometimes it will be hard for me when I disagree with some parents' opinions, but I have to continue to try and work with them and come up with the best plan for their child.
Chapter 13
In this chapter Tomaso shows even more of a connection with Lori, and how he can even have a protective instinct kick in when it comes to her. Lori was talking about her brand new doll she received for Christmas to the point where it was excessive. Torey noticed that Tomaso was very polite during the whole thing, and complimented him for being polite about it. When she said this, Tomaso told her, "You know, once I had this teddy bear and I liked him a whole lot. I was always showing him around and junk. So I know how it is. Little kids are like that. I was myself." This was a very touching moment because Tomaso, who is usually quick to make fun of things and put others down, defended Lori and her innocence.
Torey was also having a hard time figuring out Claudia. When she finally received her file, all it said was that she was painfully shy and that her parents were cold and competitive. She had grades and scores far above average but not quite to a 'gifted' level. Torey said something during this chapter that I really liked. She said:
"This kind of child made me so damned frustrated. Why didn't anyone ever see them? How could they sit and rot for years in classrooms without someone noticing them? They were invisible kids. Claudia was in as much trouble emotionally as Tomaso was. Yet, in the current state of the art, if one were bothersome, one usually gained attention and subsequently treatment. On the other hand, one could kill oneself quietly and as long as one did not disturb anybody else doing it, no one noticed. Or cared."
I really liked this quote because it is something I have thought so much about before. We seem to pay all of this attention to the kids who openly struggle and are much louder and boisterous about their problems, when there are so many students who have just as serious of issues that don't show the stereotypical signs. I hope that as a future educator I will be able to be fair in my treatment of all students and hopefully notice signs of students who maybe aren't as obviously struggling, but just need someone to talk to.
Torey was also having a hard time figuring out Claudia. When she finally received her file, all it said was that she was painfully shy and that her parents were cold and competitive. She had grades and scores far above average but not quite to a 'gifted' level. Torey said something during this chapter that I really liked. She said:
"This kind of child made me so damned frustrated. Why didn't anyone ever see them? How could they sit and rot for years in classrooms without someone noticing them? They were invisible kids. Claudia was in as much trouble emotionally as Tomaso was. Yet, in the current state of the art, if one were bothersome, one usually gained attention and subsequently treatment. On the other hand, one could kill oneself quietly and as long as one did not disturb anybody else doing it, no one noticed. Or cared."
I really liked this quote because it is something I have thought so much about before. We seem to pay all of this attention to the kids who openly struggle and are much louder and boisterous about their problems, when there are so many students who have just as serious of issues that don't show the stereotypical signs. I hope that as a future educator I will be able to be fair in my treatment of all students and hopefully notice signs of students who maybe aren't as obviously struggling, but just need someone to talk to.
Chapter 12
Torey now has a new student in her classroom. Her name is Claudia, and she is not very typical compared to the students Torey normally has assigned to her classroom. Claudia comes from a parochial school and is twelve years old. She is very well behaved, quiet, and a good student. When Torey asked why Claudia was being put into her classroom, the person in charge of placement told her that Claudia was pregnant. This of course was a shock to Torey since Claudia is only twelve years old, and Torey was not really sure how to deal with a pregnant student. Everyone reassured Torey that Claudia would be very easy to work with, and that she just wanted to be in a place where she wouldn't be noticed while she was pregnant. When Lori and Tomaso are told about Claudia, they are incredibly shocked and Tomaso is worried about talking about it in front of Lori and Boo, because it involved having sex. Torey thinks this is funny, since Tomaso says curse words all the time without ever thinking of how old Lori and Boo are and how it might affect them.
It is crazy to think that students getting pregnant at the very beginning of adolescence happens, but it happens all the time. This book has done a great job of making me think about all types of situations and how I would deal with them in my own classroom. I really feel sorry for Claudia and how embarrassed she was about her situation. Going to a Catholic school I'm sure she felt incredibly ashamed. I would want my students to know that they can come to me to talk without being judged about these types of things. I think all students no matter what they have done need someone who still appreciates them and what they are capable of, and knowing that even though they have gone through some tough situations they are cared for.
The other surprise for Torey came with Boo. Until this point Boo had never actually verbally communicated with anyone. He would only make some sounds and had delayed echolalia, but it was never directed at anyone in particular. This time, although it was still considered echolalia (he was repeating what someone else had told him), through that he told Torey and Lori about someone telling him not to touch the plug-ins in the wall. When they would ask him questions, he would elaborate with more echolalia.
It was nice to read this part of the story because it made me feel like Torey was finally making some progress with Boo, who is very misunderstood. I hope that I will be able to make the same types of progress with my future students, not matter how seemingly small.
It is crazy to think that students getting pregnant at the very beginning of adolescence happens, but it happens all the time. This book has done a great job of making me think about all types of situations and how I would deal with them in my own classroom. I really feel sorry for Claudia and how embarrassed she was about her situation. Going to a Catholic school I'm sure she felt incredibly ashamed. I would want my students to know that they can come to me to talk without being judged about these types of things. I think all students no matter what they have done need someone who still appreciates them and what they are capable of, and knowing that even though they have gone through some tough situations they are cared for.
The other surprise for Torey came with Boo. Until this point Boo had never actually verbally communicated with anyone. He would only make some sounds and had delayed echolalia, but it was never directed at anyone in particular. This time, although it was still considered echolalia (he was repeating what someone else had told him), through that he told Torey and Lori about someone telling him not to touch the plug-ins in the wall. When they would ask him questions, he would elaborate with more echolalia.
It was nice to read this part of the story because it made me feel like Torey was finally making some progress with Boo, who is very misunderstood. I hope that I will be able to make the same types of progress with my future students, not matter how seemingly small.
Chapter 11
This chapter doesn't really talk about the students too much, but Torey does talk more about her relationship with Joc. In the book this takes place over Christmas break. The two of them had just thrown a nice Christmas party, something that Torey wasn't usually in to but Joc had insisted. Torey had had a good time, and so did Joc. The next day they were sitting together wrapping presents as Joc talked about how big of a success the party was. During one of the silences Joc tells Torey that they should get married. This takes Torey by surprise, as she knew she wasn't ready to marry anyone and she had always known that she wasn't meant to marry Joc, but they were in a good place at the moment. When she hesitated to answer Joc becomes angry and tells Torey that her job has consumed her life and it is because of her kids that she won't get attached enough to anyone. He tells her that no one is going to want to be with someone who comes with an insane asylum. Even though Torey hadn't even been thinking about her classroom when he asked that question, and was hesitating because it was just a really big thing to think about, this only confirmed what she previously knew. Joc described being with her as being in a bed with two other people: Torey and her job. Torey tried to explain that it wasn't another person, and that her job was just a part of her, but Joc ended up leaving. He came back later in the evening to apologize, and told her that he knew they weren't going to end up together but he had to have at least tried.
I think this is an interesting thing to think about. It is important to think about what is important in the classroom but also how one's job is going to affect other parts of their life. Is it going to affect the people you are with: significant other, friends, family? If so, what sorts of sacrifices are we willing to make. Are we going to be with someone who isn't going to make us sacrifice something we are passionate about? These are all good questions to think about when it comes to having a career of any sort, let alone a teaching career where work always comes home.
I think this is an interesting thing to think about. It is important to think about what is important in the classroom but also how one's job is going to affect other parts of their life. Is it going to affect the people you are with: significant other, friends, family? If so, what sorts of sacrifices are we willing to make. Are we going to be with someone who isn't going to make us sacrifice something we are passionate about? These are all good questions to think about when it comes to having a career of any sort, let alone a teaching career where work always comes home.
Chapter 10
Torey decided to do a project with her students where they plant hyacinths in pots to put on their windowsill for the winter. Tomaso ends up getting frustrated with the project, first saying that he wanted to do his own to give to his father (who is no longer living), and ends up smashing the little pots. When Torey replaces the pots with milk cartons and finally gets the students back to work, Tomaso gets frustrated again and starts making mean comments to Torey about how stupid the project is and how it is her fault that it isn't working. He also tells Torey that if it were his father helping with the flowers, they would be turning out perfectly. This is where Torey makes a comment that she knew immediately after was inappropriate. She tells Tomaso, "Your dad really makes you angry doesn't he?". To this Tomaso immediately starts tearing up and runs out of the classroom. Torey ends up having to find a teacher aide to watch her classroom while she searched for Tomaso. She finally finds him in the auditorium backstage where they were storing old desks. He was in the back corner underneath all of them. Torey apologizes and tries to get Tomaso to come out, but he tells her that all she ever does is talk and never listens. When she listens to him, he tells her that he wants to kill himself because life is too hard (he is only 10 years old). He also talks about how everyone hates him. To this Torey tells him that Lori doesn't hate him, and he tells her that he doesn't hate Lori either. When he accuses Torey of hating him she tells him that she wishes she could find a way to tell him that she really cared about him so that he would believe her. Tomaso ends up crying again, and eventually comes out and hugs Torey.
This chapter was extremely emotional because Tomaso expresses his sadness with his life and the belief that everyone who has met him, hates him. Of course no one wants to be in this type of situation, hearing that a student/any person is so sad that they don't want to live anymore, but if I do have this situation come upon me I only hope I can handle it as well as Torey did, and to make the person feel like someone cares.
This chapter was extremely emotional because Tomaso expresses his sadness with his life and the belief that everyone who has met him, hates him. Of course no one wants to be in this type of situation, hearing that a student/any person is so sad that they don't want to live anymore, but if I do have this situation come upon me I only hope I can handle it as well as Torey did, and to make the person feel like someone cares.
Chapter 9
This chapter was split into 2 main parts, and they were definitely issues that were interesting and even hard to read about at times.
The first issue was a little more lighthearted: Santa Claus. Lori continued to talk about how she believed in Santa but her twin sister didn't, and asked if she was wrong for believing in him. The author discusses how she still has a hard time dealing with the topic of Santa Claus because there really is no 'good' answer to provide. I realized that if I were asked about Santa, I would feel the same way. If you say "no", you've destroyed dreams and a sentiment that makes others from all sorts of backgrounds really happy, especially around the holidays. If you say "yes", you're being dishonest. I really liked how it was handled in the book. Tomaso somewhat 'saved' Torey from having to answer, telling Lori that he still believed in Santa, and that there are things that many people, even adults, believe in that we never see. He then started talking about how he believed in Jesus and Mary, and prayed to them every night, but had never actually seen them. This was interesting to read about because it showed that through everything he had gone through, Tomaso still looked to people/things for faith. It was very touching.
The next part of the book was infuriating. Boo got hurt on the playground and had to be brought into the hospital. Torey and some other staff took met Boo's mother in the emergency room. When the doctor came to look at Boo, Torey had been the only person there. The doctor started getting frustrated when Boo would not respond to him. He even asked Torey if the child was 'psychotic'. When Torey said they were guessing he was autistic, the doctor started talking about 'what a waste' it was because Boo was a good-looking child. When Boo's mother came back into the room, the doctor and nurse put restraints on Boo, and started taking out a needle and thread. No anesthetics or anything. Boo's mother didn't say ANYTHING and just whimpered timidly. When Torey asked the doctor why he wasn't using anything he told her, "You know he doesn't really feel it. These people, they have no true feelings. Only what they imagine. No point in wasting good medicine on them." Well, Torey ended up getting kicked out of the room for getting so mad at the doctor, and reading this part made me really angry as well. It is amazing how students with disabilities used to be treated and I cannot imagine having to watch while that was being done to another human being.
I am very thankful that we have improved how we treat ALL of our students, and this chapter opened my eyes to the fact that they used to be treated basically like non-humans.
The first issue was a little more lighthearted: Santa Claus. Lori continued to talk about how she believed in Santa but her twin sister didn't, and asked if she was wrong for believing in him. The author discusses how she still has a hard time dealing with the topic of Santa Claus because there really is no 'good' answer to provide. I realized that if I were asked about Santa, I would feel the same way. If you say "no", you've destroyed dreams and a sentiment that makes others from all sorts of backgrounds really happy, especially around the holidays. If you say "yes", you're being dishonest. I really liked how it was handled in the book. Tomaso somewhat 'saved' Torey from having to answer, telling Lori that he still believed in Santa, and that there are things that many people, even adults, believe in that we never see. He then started talking about how he believed in Jesus and Mary, and prayed to them every night, but had never actually seen them. This was interesting to read about because it showed that through everything he had gone through, Tomaso still looked to people/things for faith. It was very touching.
The next part of the book was infuriating. Boo got hurt on the playground and had to be brought into the hospital. Torey and some other staff took met Boo's mother in the emergency room. When the doctor came to look at Boo, Torey had been the only person there. The doctor started getting frustrated when Boo would not respond to him. He even asked Torey if the child was 'psychotic'. When Torey said they were guessing he was autistic, the doctor started talking about 'what a waste' it was because Boo was a good-looking child. When Boo's mother came back into the room, the doctor and nurse put restraints on Boo, and started taking out a needle and thread. No anesthetics or anything. Boo's mother didn't say ANYTHING and just whimpered timidly. When Torey asked the doctor why he wasn't using anything he told her, "You know he doesn't really feel it. These people, they have no true feelings. Only what they imagine. No point in wasting good medicine on them." Well, Torey ended up getting kicked out of the room for getting so mad at the doctor, and reading this part made me really angry as well. It is amazing how students with disabilities used to be treated and I cannot imagine having to watch while that was being done to another human being.
I am very thankful that we have improved how we treat ALL of our students, and this chapter opened my eyes to the fact that they used to be treated basically like non-humans.
Chapter 8
This chapter describes some of the many struggles Torey faced when dealing with Tomaso. She basically lists all of the things he did in order to try and drive the teacher crazy. One of the things that stood out to me was the fact that he actually affected some things she did with the words he said. Tomaso would always tell Torey how bad her breath smelled, and for this reason she started brushing her teeth all the time, bringing mouthwash to school, and covering her mouth when talking to people. She finally realized much later that Tomaso said this to a lot of adults, and that she had probably been worrying for nothing.
The only person who seemed to be making some sort of connection with Tomaso was Lori. Torey attributed this to the fact that Lori had been open with Tomaso about her experiences, plus she did not show fear around him like most other children had in his past. Tomaso actually talked to Lori without using too vulgar of language, and was interested in what she had to say.
Torey eventually grew to love Tomaso and feel like she was lucky to have him. She said something at the end of the chapter that I thought was really interesting. It was, "I loved Tomaso's scandalous approach to life, his outrageous ability to hang on in a world that had been anything but kind to him, and indeed even to extract a few laughs from it....In the beginning I had thought only anger lived there, but I had grown to know fear was really the master and anger only the slave." (pg 89). It is amazing to hear how the author is able to open her arms and really accept anyone that comes into her unique little classroom.
The only person who seemed to be making some sort of connection with Tomaso was Lori. Torey attributed this to the fact that Lori had been open with Tomaso about her experiences, plus she did not show fear around him like most other children had in his past. Tomaso actually talked to Lori without using too vulgar of language, and was interested in what she had to say.
Torey eventually grew to love Tomaso and feel like she was lucky to have him. She said something at the end of the chapter that I thought was really interesting. It was, "I loved Tomaso's scandalous approach to life, his outrageous ability to hang on in a world that had been anything but kind to him, and indeed even to extract a few laughs from it....In the beginning I had thought only anger lived there, but I had grown to know fear was really the master and anger only the slave." (pg 89). It is amazing to hear how the author is able to open her arms and really accept anyone that comes into her unique little classroom.
Chapter 7
Chapter 7 introduced us to a new character, Tomaso. Tomaso is a new student in Torey's classroom who has an abundance of behavior issues. He is a "migrant child" who has been moving from foster home to foster home and has had a very unstable academic career. At one school he was enrolled in 3rd grade, then in 2nd grade at another school, and so on. He is very disruptive for Torey, Boo, and Lori as he seems to try to make people mad. Something he said in this chapter that really stood out was when he was trying to provoke Torey with little to no success. Tomaso said, "What's the matter with you? Why don't you go ahead and hate me like everybody else does? What makes you think you're so special?" This gave a lot of insight as to why he acts the way he does, being that he feels like everyone hates him so that's the kind of attention he is used to and needs. Since he never gets positive attention, he will try to provoke any kind of attention, even if it is negative.
Something else that came into play was Tomaso's family history. In this chapter Tomaso said, "I don't really belong in a class like this. My real father, he'll come get me pretty soon. He knows I'm waiting." When he originally said this there was already a realization that Tomaso came from a broken family and that there was some sort of abandonment by the father. When Torey actually went through his file, she found out that his father had been FATALLY shot by his stepmother and that Tomaso WITNESSED it happen. This was a huge shock to me as I was reading because I could not imagine what it would be like to have to deal with a situation like that: A child in denial about his own father's death.
Tomaso is very unkind to everyone in the classroom, but when Lori volunteers certain information about himself he starts to 'somewhat' come around. Lori tells Tomaso that she too was in a foster home. When he asked why she told him that it was probably because her parents were just sick of having her. This interests Tomaso and he asks how she knew, to which she responded, "I just did." After this conversation Tomaso tapes of Lori's folder that he had previously ripped apart, and tells her that she looks "a little Spanish". Lori says she doesn't think so, but Tomaso insists. I really enjoyed this part because Tomaso uses his ethnicity to separate himself from people, and as soon as he figured out that he was able to relate to someone, he was going to attribute it to the fact that they must have something else in common with him too (in this case, being Spanish).
This chapter probably brought about the most emotional story. Of course they are all very emotional, but Tomaso's background is so traumatizing it makes my heart break for him and for any other children who have behavioral issues but are judged because people don't know their story.
Something else that came into play was Tomaso's family history. In this chapter Tomaso said, "I don't really belong in a class like this. My real father, he'll come get me pretty soon. He knows I'm waiting." When he originally said this there was already a realization that Tomaso came from a broken family and that there was some sort of abandonment by the father. When Torey actually went through his file, she found out that his father had been FATALLY shot by his stepmother and that Tomaso WITNESSED it happen. This was a huge shock to me as I was reading because I could not imagine what it would be like to have to deal with a situation like that: A child in denial about his own father's death.
Tomaso is very unkind to everyone in the classroom, but when Lori volunteers certain information about himself he starts to 'somewhat' come around. Lori tells Tomaso that she too was in a foster home. When he asked why she told him that it was probably because her parents were just sick of having her. This interests Tomaso and he asks how she knew, to which she responded, "I just did." After this conversation Tomaso tapes of Lori's folder that he had previously ripped apart, and tells her that she looks "a little Spanish". Lori says she doesn't think so, but Tomaso insists. I really enjoyed this part because Tomaso uses his ethnicity to separate himself from people, and as soon as he figured out that he was able to relate to someone, he was going to attribute it to the fact that they must have something else in common with him too (in this case, being Spanish).
This chapter probably brought about the most emotional story. Of course they are all very emotional, but Tomaso's background is so traumatizing it makes my heart break for him and for any other children who have behavioral issues but are judged because people don't know their story.
Tuesday, November 20, 2012
Chapter 6
Chapter 6 reveals some much anticipated background information about Boo. Torey finally gets to talk with his mother, Mrs. Franklin, who until that conference was always seeming to avoid Torey. When they talked, Torey found out how scared Mrs. Franklin was that someone was going to come and take Boo away from her. She said that it was because her husband told her someone would if Boo couldn't learn to talk right, and that someone would take him to an insane asylum. Mrs. Franklin and her husband had fought a long battle with Boo, and originally their physician told them that Boo was just going through a stage. Through infancy, Boo was somewhat delayed but did learn many things at a fairly normal rate. Once he turned three, their doctor still insisted he was just going through a phase, but when they enrolled him into a preschool someone immediately recognized his symptoms to be that of autism. They traveled all over and went broke trying to figure out how to help Boo by enrolling him in all sorts of schools/programs who all had different philosophies, all of which failed. This was heartbreaking for Torey because she hated to hear about people who did nothing wrong and had such difficult situations placed upon them. Reading this part made me feel sad as well, and it really makes one realize how even those with the best intentions can end up on difficult times. When it is all said and done, Mr. and Mrs. Franklin still loved Boo, but they were just so sad, scared, and frustrated because they felt helpless when it came to helping him. A quote that really resonated with me was when Mrs. Franklin was talking about her sister's son in comparison to hers, and the huge difference in goals one can have based on circumstances. She said, "My sister has a little boy just four months younger than Boothie. She always writes me about what Merlin is doing. He's in second grade. He got picked to sing in the children's choir at church. And all I want is for Boothe to call me mama."
The next part of the chapter took place around Halloween. Lori was supposed to spend the second half of the day in her normal classroom because they were all going to wear costumes and celebrate. She ended up running into Torey's room part way through because a boy told her she was "the retardedest girl in the whole school". She then asked Torey if she was, because she had flunked kindergarten and said she was probably going to flunk first grade. Torey told Lori that there is nothing wrong with her. I definitely think this is a very difficult and fragile situation that I imagine I will have to deal with in some form or another. I've already heard kids in my practicum hours/other experiences with children who tell everyone that they are stupid, because they don't want the children to get their hopes up for any success being brought about by that child. I have also seen children many times call OTHER students stupid and tell them that they can't do things that 'normal' people can do. These situations make me really upset and sad, and are often difficult to deal with.
The next part of the chapter took place around Halloween. Lori was supposed to spend the second half of the day in her normal classroom because they were all going to wear costumes and celebrate. She ended up running into Torey's room part way through because a boy told her she was "the retardedest girl in the whole school". She then asked Torey if she was, because she had flunked kindergarten and said she was probably going to flunk first grade. Torey told Lori that there is nothing wrong with her. I definitely think this is a very difficult and fragile situation that I imagine I will have to deal with in some form or another. I've already heard kids in my practicum hours/other experiences with children who tell everyone that they are stupid, because they don't want the children to get their hopes up for any success being brought about by that child. I have also seen children many times call OTHER students stupid and tell them that they can't do things that 'normal' people can do. These situations make me really upset and sad, and are often difficult to deal with.
Monday, November 19, 2012
Chapter 5
This chapter was interesting in that the narrator started off talking about her personal life rather than her work life. She discussed the relationship she had with what I assume to be an ex-boyfriend Joc. Torey talks about how she and Joc are actually very different but that they seemed to work out okay. On the other hand, he was starting to get very frustrated with her because she couldn't seem to "leave her work at home." The incident she recalls happened when a friend and teacher gave her an idea for making ice cream with students in class. Rather than go out to dinner with Joc, Torey tells him she wants to stay in and try the idea. He becomes very frustrated with this and does not understand why Torey is so absorbed in the lives of these kids. They end up going out, but she hints that Joc was not "the one" for her because of his failure to understand her passion.
The next day Torey is trying to organize the materials to make ice cream with Lori and Boo. Things start off shaky as Boo takes the mixing bowl and puts it on his head and runs around the room. When they finally get the bowl away from Boo, Lori puts cream in the bowl and decides she is strong enough to bring the mixture over to the center table. Torey tells her not to and to just wait until she is ready to help, but Lori insists and continues to bring the bowl over. She ends up dropping the bowl, which smashes into pieces, leaving the heavy cream to spill all over Lori as well as the floor. This ends up being a scary moment for Torey, because when she goes to talk to Lori, Lori keeps repeating the same phrases "I didn't mean to", "I'm sorry", and "Are you gonna wup me?" over and over. It seems as though Lori is not speaking to Torey, but to someone else. Torey never finds out if this is a seizure or a psychotic episode, but it is one of the scarier moments in her career.
This chapter brought about two very different but important situations to think about. Going back to the Joc situation, I think it is important for me to be with someone who would understand my compassion for students, and have the understanding that as a teacher my work is never REALLY done at the end of the day when I leave the building.
This chapter also made me a little nervous for scary situations which I'm sure all teachers have to face at one point or another, varying in how extreme of course. I hope that I will be able to have the resources and support to handle a situation where I am concerned about the physical/mental health of a student.
The next day Torey is trying to organize the materials to make ice cream with Lori and Boo. Things start off shaky as Boo takes the mixing bowl and puts it on his head and runs around the room. When they finally get the bowl away from Boo, Lori puts cream in the bowl and decides she is strong enough to bring the mixture over to the center table. Torey tells her not to and to just wait until she is ready to help, but Lori insists and continues to bring the bowl over. She ends up dropping the bowl, which smashes into pieces, leaving the heavy cream to spill all over Lori as well as the floor. This ends up being a scary moment for Torey, because when she goes to talk to Lori, Lori keeps repeating the same phrases "I didn't mean to", "I'm sorry", and "Are you gonna wup me?" over and over. It seems as though Lori is not speaking to Torey, but to someone else. Torey never finds out if this is a seizure or a psychotic episode, but it is one of the scarier moments in her career.
This chapter brought about two very different but important situations to think about. Going back to the Joc situation, I think it is important for me to be with someone who would understand my compassion for students, and have the understanding that as a teacher my work is never REALLY done at the end of the day when I leave the building.
This chapter also made me a little nervous for scary situations which I'm sure all teachers have to face at one point or another, varying in how extreme of course. I hope that I will be able to have the resources and support to handle a situation where I am concerned about the physical/mental health of a student.
Sunday, November 18, 2012
Chapter 4
Chapter 4 focused a lot on Lori again, and delved further into her back story. Now Lori is in Torey's classroom half-days because of conflicts with her classroom teacher so Torey is able to meet with Lori's father on a more regular basis and learn more about her history. Mr. Sjokheim (Lori's adoptive father) has had a very sad past. He and his wife had a child, who due to a freak accident had such severe brain damage that she was on life support for months, and eventually died. When he and his wife decided to move somewhere new and start over, they had Lori and Libby, the twins, as foster children. They decided to adopt the twins, and soon after Mrs. Sjokheim became ill with cancer. She died a year after the twins had been adopted. He also talked about how Lori was born prematurely and how this may have somewhat affected her learning, but that she also had lesions in her skull from abuse in her previous home.
This chapter really brought out thoughts about not only dealing with children from abusive situations but those situations in general. It is so sad to think about how unstable one really has to be in order to even think about abusing someone else, let alone a small child. Thinking about it really makes me sick, and I hope as a future educator I can help those who have been abused see the light, and to educate everyone on all kinds of abuse.
A quote I really liked from this chapter was at the very end, because it really summed up nicely what I have thought about children coming from unfortunate circumstances who have a lot of difficulties. Torey said:
"I could not imagine what it must be like to be seven and to have known failure half my life, to get up every morning and come spend six hours in a place where try as I might, I could never really succeed. And by law Lori had at least seven more years ahead of her of this torture, as many years left as she lived. Men murdered and received shorter prison terms than that. All Lori had done was to be born into the wrong family."
As a future teacher, it is my hope that I can make school a safe and positive environment for all of my students. I understand that school is not necessarily always FUN for everyone, but I want to do my best to help students who struggle to not feel like they are being punished.
This chapter really brought out thoughts about not only dealing with children from abusive situations but those situations in general. It is so sad to think about how unstable one really has to be in order to even think about abusing someone else, let alone a small child. Thinking about it really makes me sick, and I hope as a future educator I can help those who have been abused see the light, and to educate everyone on all kinds of abuse.
A quote I really liked from this chapter was at the very end, because it really summed up nicely what I have thought about children coming from unfortunate circumstances who have a lot of difficulties. Torey said:
"I could not imagine what it must be like to be seven and to have known failure half my life, to get up every morning and come spend six hours in a place where try as I might, I could never really succeed. And by law Lori had at least seven more years ahead of her of this torture, as many years left as she lived. Men murdered and received shorter prison terms than that. All Lori had done was to be born into the wrong family."
As a future teacher, it is my hope that I can make school a safe and positive environment for all of my students. I understand that school is not necessarily always FUN for everyone, but I want to do my best to help students who struggle to not feel like they are being punished.
Chapter 3
This chapter brought up a very interesting issue. In the beginning Torey talks about how the school she is currently at is promoting a new reading program. The program seems great to all the adults, but that is BECAUSE they are adults. The books really aren't realistically helpful for children, and the adults buy them because they are catering to more adult audience and have higher level vocabulary than what would be used for elementary-aged children. Since Torey usually works with the younger or failing students, she immediately noticed that these books were not only NOT helping the students, but were taking shots at their self esteem. When asking the publishers of the book about these problems, they told her that the students were actually exactly where they should be, which really angered Torey, because it would only make sense for students to understand that if they are not reading at their "grade level" then they are not where they need to be. One quote I liked from this part was:
"And of course nothing could ever be said to these children who were reading fourth-grade books in sixth that would convince them that they were anything other than stupid. It was nothing more than statistics to the publishing company. For the kids it was life. That was such a bitterly high price to pay for an aesthetically pleasing book."
Reading this really made me think about the content of books in schools and who they are really aimed at helping. Although t his book was written almost thirty years ago and I strongly believe that things have improved since then, it is still important to think about what is best for the students, rather than what is more interesting for the teacher to use.
This created a segue into the next part, which specifically talked about Lori again. Lori, who already has trouble in school, was having even more trouble with these new books. It did not help that her general education teacher did not believe that special education students should be in a 'normal' classroom and referred to them as 'slowies'. Her teacher, Edna Thorsen, also believed that Lori was only doing poorly because she was trying to act defiant towards to teacher, so it was more of a behavioral issue than a learning issue. Torey knew that this of course was not true. This part of the chapter was really sad to me because I cannot imagine having a teacher that did not believe in me and who openly stated that they didn't want me there. It would be so heartbreaking to be ANY age and to have to hear that, and feel like you couldn't do anything to make things better. Edna ends up making Lori stay in from recess when she doesn't finish her workbook pages correctly, rather than letting her go to Torey for help later on in the day. When Lori continues to struggle, Edna decides to keep her after school. One day Lori has an outburst in class out of frustration, and is sent to the principal's office for a 'paddling'. When Torey hears of this, she immediately walks to the office and asks if she can take Lori into her classroom for the rest of the day.
It is unbelievable the an adult can know so many of the circumstance of a child: sexual/physical abuse, brain injuries, pre-natal issues, etc. and still be so heartless and misunderstanding of a child. Reading things like this make it more clear to me that it is extremely important to try to gather all of the facts before making assumptions of my students.
"And of course nothing could ever be said to these children who were reading fourth-grade books in sixth that would convince them that they were anything other than stupid. It was nothing more than statistics to the publishing company. For the kids it was life. That was such a bitterly high price to pay for an aesthetically pleasing book."
Reading this really made me think about the content of books in schools and who they are really aimed at helping. Although t his book was written almost thirty years ago and I strongly believe that things have improved since then, it is still important to think about what is best for the students, rather than what is more interesting for the teacher to use.
This created a segue into the next part, which specifically talked about Lori again. Lori, who already has trouble in school, was having even more trouble with these new books. It did not help that her general education teacher did not believe that special education students should be in a 'normal' classroom and referred to them as 'slowies'. Her teacher, Edna Thorsen, also believed that Lori was only doing poorly because she was trying to act defiant towards to teacher, so it was more of a behavioral issue than a learning issue. Torey knew that this of course was not true. This part of the chapter was really sad to me because I cannot imagine having a teacher that did not believe in me and who openly stated that they didn't want me there. It would be so heartbreaking to be ANY age and to have to hear that, and feel like you couldn't do anything to make things better. Edna ends up making Lori stay in from recess when she doesn't finish her workbook pages correctly, rather than letting her go to Torey for help later on in the day. When Lori continues to struggle, Edna decides to keep her after school. One day Lori has an outburst in class out of frustration, and is sent to the principal's office for a 'paddling'. When Torey hears of this, she immediately walks to the office and asks if she can take Lori into her classroom for the rest of the day.
It is unbelievable the an adult can know so many of the circumstance of a child: sexual/physical abuse, brain injuries, pre-natal issues, etc. and still be so heartless and misunderstanding of a child. Reading things like this make it more clear to me that it is extremely important to try to gather all of the facts before making assumptions of my students.
Chapter 2
This chapter talks about what happens when Boo has run out of the classroom. He ends up running all the way to a kindergarten classroom and hides under a rug. By the time Torey finds him, the kindergarten class is coming back from recess and are wondering what he is doing. Torey calmly picks up Boo, now not struggling, and tells the students that he wanted to see what was under the rug. When she brings him back a student named Lori is waiting for her in the resource room. Lori is adopted, and was previously abused in her home beforehand. She is also a twin who did not receive as much nourishment/oxygen as her sister, so she has been left with learning disabilities. These disabilities aside, she is a very smart and caring girl.
It was really interesting to read about Lori, because your heart really breaks for her. Even though she is such bright and caring person, she just cannot learn very easily. Part of this is also attributed to the fact that when she was abused, her skull was fractured and a piece of bone was pushed into her brain. Something the author mentioned about Torey which crosses over to a lot of different cases with students was that, "For all intents and purposes, Lori was normal. Because of this, I noticed that people, myself included, tended to forget she was not. And sometimes we became angry with her for things over which she had no control." I really liked this quote because I think as an educator one has to realize that even the students who don't show their disabilities socially or in every day tasks, we still have to remember the things they do struggle with and try not to become frustrated when they cannot do things that other students can.
The chapter ended focusing on Boo again, who finally started to talk. He did not speak directly to anyone, or about anything relevant. What he DID do was recite word-for-word the morning weather. Torey called this "delayed echolalia". I thought this was very interesting because when I coached tennis this summer there was an autistic boy who would do something similar, except not delayed. He would repeat each direction I told him over and over. To end the chapter this way sent a very strong message about the quantity of information children with autism really can retain, which gives one hope when thinking about what they are capable of in a school setting.
It was really interesting to read about Lori, because your heart really breaks for her. Even though she is such bright and caring person, she just cannot learn very easily. Part of this is also attributed to the fact that when she was abused, her skull was fractured and a piece of bone was pushed into her brain. Something the author mentioned about Torey which crosses over to a lot of different cases with students was that, "For all intents and purposes, Lori was normal. Because of this, I noticed that people, myself included, tended to forget she was not. And sometimes we became angry with her for things over which she had no control." I really liked this quote because I think as an educator one has to realize that even the students who don't show their disabilities socially or in every day tasks, we still have to remember the things they do struggle with and try not to become frustrated when they cannot do things that other students can.
The chapter ended focusing on Boo again, who finally started to talk. He did not speak directly to anyone, or about anything relevant. What he DID do was recite word-for-word the morning weather. Torey called this "delayed echolalia". I thought this was very interesting because when I coached tennis this summer there was an autistic boy who would do something similar, except not delayed. He would repeat each direction I told him over and over. To end the chapter this way sent a very strong message about the quantity of information children with autism really can retain, which gives one hope when thinking about what they are capable of in a school setting.
Thursday, November 8, 2012
Chapter 1
For my EDUC 250 class (Educating Exceptional Students) ability project I have chosen to read a book and blog all the while. As the title of this blog suggests, the book I chose is titled Somebody Else's Kids by Torey L. Hayden. Before picking it from the list I really had no idea what to expect, other than that it would have something to do with a student with an exceptionality.
The first chapter opens with the narrator talking about the 'vacuum'. The vacuum they speak of has to do with the process of mainstreaming students into the classroom who were previously in self-contained special education rooms. As I read further, I came to find out that the narrator's name is Torey (the author), and she was the teacher of a self-contained special education classroom until Public Law 94-142, which we have discussed in class, was passed. After that, the children in her classroom were sent to general education rooms, and she was sent to work as a resource teacher in another school across town.
Two years later, the director of special education in the district asks Torey if she would be willing to take on a student that has been driving his general education teacher crazy. His name is Booth, or "Boo" as they refer to him in the book, and he is assumed to be autistic. He is seven years old and still in a half day kindergarten classroom (at the school she PREVIOUSLY) taught at. Torey was nervous to take on the task at first because her new room was not really equipped for that type of teaching anymore, but she decided to agree to the task.
The first day Boo comes to class she has a hard time getting him to do things as soon as he gets into the classroom. His mother had barely said anything to him before she left, which I found really sad being that he is already a student who needs extra help and now he is being put into a totally new and possibly scary situation. Boo tends to repeat the things Torey says straight back to him, without actually doing any of the things she is asking. Suddenly, Boo starts screaming and eventually runs out of the classroom. This is where Chapter 1 ends.
I am already extremely interested in this story. It is much more interesting to hear a first person narrative of a situation than reading it in a textbook. Real life experiences in my opinion are the best tools for learning. That being said, I cannot imagine the stress I would feel if on my first day with a student in a somewhat new situation for me, the student started screaming and ran out of the classroom! I can't even think about how scared I would be of every bad thing that could possibly happen. It was very interesting for me to read about how Boo acts (repeating things softly, etc.) because one summer while I was teaching tennis to elementary students, there was a boy with autism who did the exact same thing. Luckily we didn't have any incidents, but we did have to make some accommodations for his learning.
I cannot wait to read the rest of this book!
The first chapter opens with the narrator talking about the 'vacuum'. The vacuum they speak of has to do with the process of mainstreaming students into the classroom who were previously in self-contained special education rooms. As I read further, I came to find out that the narrator's name is Torey (the author), and she was the teacher of a self-contained special education classroom until Public Law 94-142, which we have discussed in class, was passed. After that, the children in her classroom were sent to general education rooms, and she was sent to work as a resource teacher in another school across town.
Two years later, the director of special education in the district asks Torey if she would be willing to take on a student that has been driving his general education teacher crazy. His name is Booth, or "Boo" as they refer to him in the book, and he is assumed to be autistic. He is seven years old and still in a half day kindergarten classroom (at the school she PREVIOUSLY) taught at. Torey was nervous to take on the task at first because her new room was not really equipped for that type of teaching anymore, but she decided to agree to the task.
The first day Boo comes to class she has a hard time getting him to do things as soon as he gets into the classroom. His mother had barely said anything to him before she left, which I found really sad being that he is already a student who needs extra help and now he is being put into a totally new and possibly scary situation. Boo tends to repeat the things Torey says straight back to him, without actually doing any of the things she is asking. Suddenly, Boo starts screaming and eventually runs out of the classroom. This is where Chapter 1 ends.
I am already extremely interested in this story. It is much more interesting to hear a first person narrative of a situation than reading it in a textbook. Real life experiences in my opinion are the best tools for learning. That being said, I cannot imagine the stress I would feel if on my first day with a student in a somewhat new situation for me, the student started screaming and ran out of the classroom! I can't even think about how scared I would be of every bad thing that could possibly happen. It was very interesting for me to read about how Boo acts (repeating things softly, etc.) because one summer while I was teaching tennis to elementary students, there was a boy with autism who did the exact same thing. Luckily we didn't have any incidents, but we did have to make some accommodations for his learning.
I cannot wait to read the rest of this book!
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