Chapter 34 marks the final chapter of the book. Tomaso has already gone. Claudia has a false alarm with her baby, and then ends up having a not-so-false alarm the next day. She has a baby girl named Jenny who was born prematurely at 4.4 pounds. A couple of nights later Torey gets a phone call from Claudia. She is very scared and tells Torey that Jenny is so small and that she has signed the papers for someone else to adopt her. Torey helps to make her feel better and tells her that she thinks she has made a good decision.
On the last day of school, Lori wants to celebrate with her general education class, so Torey and Boo go for a walk around a park and through a zoo. She realizes that Boo has made some positive changes, but that he is still the imaginative 'dream child' that first entered her classroom at the beginning of the year. When Mrs. Franklin comes to pick him up, he does not say goodbye but rather recites the 'Tornado Watch' recording that comes on the television during storms.
Lori comes into the classroom at the very end of the day to get her things. She ends up dropping everything and crying. She has just been told that she did not pass the first grade, and that she will have to repeat it again the next year while her sister moves on. Lori becomes mad at Torey because she doesn't understand why Torey didn't do anything to stop it. Torey explains to her again and again that there was nothing she could have done, and if there was she would have done it. Lori is worried because she thinks she and her sister will no longer be twins. Of course Torey tells her that this is not true, and something 'silly like school' will never stop them from being twins. Torey decides to ask Lori to do something to celebrate (of course, Lori does not feel like there IS anything to celebrate). Eventually Lori decides that she wants to bring Libby along because she will be sad about school ending. Torey tries to convince her that just the two of them should go, because she feels so guilty about not being able to help Lori move on to second grade. When Torey is trying to explain, Lori says, "Don't worry so much, Tor. You always worry. It isn't that important. Now come on." (pg. 331). And they went.
There is an epilogue to the story, and there has since been communication with the children (that of which is on Torey Hayden's website). I do not want to COMPLETELY give away where they are now, so I will leave that to anyone who wants to actually read the book, which I HIGHLY recommend.
I enjoyed this book because it gave me so many great examples of situations one may have to encounter (or something similar) when working with students who have exceptionalies. It really makes one think about the education system and how the children who do not really have a 'place to belong' really feel. It also talks about some of the positives of mainstreaming, as well as the negatives. Of course, this book was written in the early eighties and things have certainly changed since then. We are constantly trying to improve the system and make school a positive place for EVERYONE to be educated. The children talked about in this story, all so different, also share the common trait of not having a place to belong. Their stories are very bittersweet and one definitely feels like they make a connection with almost everyone in the story. Torey Hayden has some incredibly inspiring quotes, my favorites being quoted in this blog. Just looking at the quotes alone should give anyone the inspiration to help students in need of extra guidance. Although I will not be licensed in special education, with mainstreaming I will have students in my class with all sorts of exceptionalities, and this book will be a great reference when it comes to thinking about the feelings of my students, and remembering to push through and fight for these students when no one else will. Sometimes the classroom is the only place where students feel like they belong, and it will be my job to make it feel that way. I want all of my future students to know that I care about them and about what happens to them, and that I want them to succeed, rather than setting them up to fail. Somebody Else's Kids by Torey Hayden was a very fast read and I recommend it to not only those going into education but anyone in general. It was definitely an eye-opener.
Monday, December 3, 2012
Chapter 33
In this chapter Torey is getting ready to throw a small party in her classroom to celebrate her birthday and Lori's "reading" success, as well as to mark the end of the year. The day before, Tomaso announces to everyone that he is moving back to Texas to live with his Uncle Iago, and seems incredibly excited. He then becomes more excited when he realizes that the party the next day can also be a going-away party for him!
When the party comes along, everything seems to be going well. Part-way through the party Torey notices that Tomaso is no where to be seen. When she asks Lori if she knows where he is, Lori tells her that he is in the closet crying because he already misses them. Torey goes to talk to Tomaso, and he is very upset because he does not even know his uncle and he wants to stay with his foster parents and with the class. He tells her that he is tired of moving. He then says, "I don't see why I should have ever bothered to do anything. I don't see why I ever bothered to be good, if they're going to make me go away. It doesn't matter now, everything I did." (pg. 319). Then he tells Torey that he is never going to like anybody again, because he knows that he will just have to miss them when they are gone. Torey tells him that that is all a part of caring about somebody. After a while, Tomaso does come out and join the rest of the party.
At the end of the day Torey waits with Tomaso for his bus. He starts telling her that his father (again, deceased) has come back from Spain and that he has come to pick up Tomaso so they can live together. He continues to repeat this. When Torey looks at Tomaso and makes eye contact, Tomaso finally says, "No, I'm not. I know that. I'm going to live with Uncle Iago. I'll never live with my father." (pg. 321). He then holds on to Torey until his bus comes.
This was a very touching moment to read because Torey has worked so hard to create and maintain a relationship with Tomaso, there have been many signs along the way telling of Tomaso's feelings about Torey and the class, and this was like the last piece of the puzzle. It is devastating to think about the students who don't put any trust/time into caring about people because they know they are just going to leave. They have the mindset that there's no point in 'being good' if they just have to ripped away from people all the time. With that in mind, what is there really to give them the incentive to care? I know that the foster system tries to keep students within the same districts or at least not moving them so far apart from previous places, but it still breaks my heart that there are children who have absolutely no stability in their lives, and really don't have much of a say in where they want to be.
When the party comes along, everything seems to be going well. Part-way through the party Torey notices that Tomaso is no where to be seen. When she asks Lori if she knows where he is, Lori tells her that he is in the closet crying because he already misses them. Torey goes to talk to Tomaso, and he is very upset because he does not even know his uncle and he wants to stay with his foster parents and with the class. He tells her that he is tired of moving. He then says, "I don't see why I should have ever bothered to do anything. I don't see why I ever bothered to be good, if they're going to make me go away. It doesn't matter now, everything I did." (pg. 319). Then he tells Torey that he is never going to like anybody again, because he knows that he will just have to miss them when they are gone. Torey tells him that that is all a part of caring about somebody. After a while, Tomaso does come out and join the rest of the party.
At the end of the day Torey waits with Tomaso for his bus. He starts telling her that his father (again, deceased) has come back from Spain and that he has come to pick up Tomaso so they can live together. He continues to repeat this. When Torey looks at Tomaso and makes eye contact, Tomaso finally says, "No, I'm not. I know that. I'm going to live with Uncle Iago. I'll never live with my father." (pg. 321). He then holds on to Torey until his bus comes.
This was a very touching moment to read because Torey has worked so hard to create and maintain a relationship with Tomaso, there have been many signs along the way telling of Tomaso's feelings about Torey and the class, and this was like the last piece of the puzzle. It is devastating to think about the students who don't put any trust/time into caring about people because they know they are just going to leave. They have the mindset that there's no point in 'being good' if they just have to ripped away from people all the time. With that in mind, what is there really to give them the incentive to care? I know that the foster system tries to keep students within the same districts or at least not moving them so far apart from previous places, but it still breaks my heart that there are children who have absolutely no stability in their lives, and really don't have much of a say in where they want to be.
Chapter 32
It is mid-may and Torey is now going to be involved in the decision-making process for placing the students that have come to her class. Claudia will go back to her school once the baby is born, that was the easiest decision. Torey knows that what Claudia needs is NOT more isolation but to be with her peers and live as normal of a life as she can with a new baby. Torey thinks Tomaso is ready for fifth grade in a normal classroom the next year, as his temper has been quite subdued, and he has learned to handle situations in a more controlled manner. Boo will be going to a private school where they still allow separate instruction of those with autism. With the mainstreaming law, it has been hard to find a place for Boo to get the attention he needs within the public schools. Lori was the one that Torey had heard nothing about. She was sure that Lori could fit in in a second grade classroom the next year. When she talked to the principal he told her that it had already been decided. They basically did not ask Torey to meet because they knew she would disagree: they would be holding Lori back. Torey was furious and told him that no matter what they did she was not going to learn to read like the other students, and that she can do everything else so why punish her for having a disability? When the principal tells Torey that they cannot put that kind of a burden on the second grade teachers, Torey says, "And we can lay it on Lori? We've half killed this girl already with our stupid ideas. She's already failed one grade; how is it going to be failing another? The child has a physical disability. You could keep her in first grade until she is a gray-haired grandmother and she may never learn to read." (pg. 308).
The principal told Torey that the decision had already been made and that Lori's father had already agreed. When Torey was in the classroom the next day, she helped Lori read a book. Of course, the book only contained two words total and Torey told Lori what they were, but Lori WAS able to distinguish a difference between the two words in the story. After many repetitions, Lori had memorized the story and was so excited about being 'able to read'. Torey knew that Lori was not really reading, but she also knew that with this kind of technique Lori would be able to cope with necessary reading (signs, etc.) with practice.
I felt very sad when the principal, Lori's general education teacher (who has really had it out for Lori since the beginning), and Lori's father decided that retaining her would be the best idea. It is clear that with her disability reading is never REALLY going to come to her, she will simply have to look at shapes of words and use other means of communication. Her speech is totally normal and other subject areas can have modifications made for her to do them. I really hope that they will change their mind about retaining Lori, especially because her twin sister will be moving on to the next grade, and Lori does not NEED to stay in first grade.
The principal told Torey that the decision had already been made and that Lori's father had already agreed. When Torey was in the classroom the next day, she helped Lori read a book. Of course, the book only contained two words total and Torey told Lori what they were, but Lori WAS able to distinguish a difference between the two words in the story. After many repetitions, Lori had memorized the story and was so excited about being 'able to read'. Torey knew that Lori was not really reading, but she also knew that with this kind of technique Lori would be able to cope with necessary reading (signs, etc.) with practice.
I felt very sad when the principal, Lori's general education teacher (who has really had it out for Lori since the beginning), and Lori's father decided that retaining her would be the best idea. It is clear that with her disability reading is never REALLY going to come to her, she will simply have to look at shapes of words and use other means of communication. Her speech is totally normal and other subject areas can have modifications made for her to do them. I really hope that they will change their mind about retaining Lori, especially because her twin sister will be moving on to the next grade, and Lori does not NEED to stay in first grade.
Chapter 31
In this chapter all seems to be going well until Boo has a huge meltdown. Torey had been outside with the children and Claudia had taken Boo inside to go to the bathroom. Suddenly Claudia comes running out the door and tells Torey to come help. When they all get inside, Boo is inside their normal classroom. This was because on the way back from the bathroom Claudia wanted to grab her sweater. There had been some early start on construction in the school for the summer, and since Torey's classroom was empty they must have decided to store things in there. There was a huge sheet of fiberglass insulation leaning against the cupboard. The side facing Boo was the shiny Mylar covering. Boo's body was trembling and his head was moving back and forth. He would flap his arms, and when he stopped he would grab his upper arms and "rake his fingernails down them". This created long/deep scratch marks in his arms. He even started to do this to his face until it bled, and started to pull out chunks of his hair. Torey and Tomaso worked together to get him into a corner, as he had been running around the room when they initially tried to get him under control. Once Torey got to him, he scratched her cheek and even bit her. Finally she got him into a position where he could not move his arms or bite her, and waited for him to calm down.
Claudia felt terrible about the situation, and repeatedly said that it was her fault for bringing him by the classroom. Torey told Claudia that it was definitely not her fault and that she could have never known that something like that was going to happen. Claudia started asking Torey if Boo will ever get better, and asked about the other children that come to their classroom. She tells Torey that her father told her it was a class for crazy kids before they have to be locked up as adults. She says, "I always thought crazy people were bad. Like Jack the Ripper or Son of Sam. I was scared to even think about them. But that isn't the way it really is, is it? Boo isn't bad. Or Tom or Lori." (pg. 302). They then go on to discuss whether or not people are good or bad, and Torey tells Claudia that no one is good or bad, and that those are just words.
Claudia responds, "No one's really any different, are they? We're all just pretty much the same." (302).
I thought this chapter was fairly interesting. Boo has made so much progress throughout this book, and he hadn't had a real meltdown in quite some time. It just goes to show that no matter how much progress one has made with a student there are still going to be some unexpected situations. I feel like he had this outburst because of the construction materials that had been placed in the room that were way out of the norm. Aside from that, I would have no idea why he resorted to hurting himself in the process. It's pretty scary to think about being in a situation like that, and I don't think anything besides a similar experience could really prepare anyone for handling it. I just hope that I have the right tools, support systems, and instincts to handle the situation in a safe way for everyone involved.
Claudia felt terrible about the situation, and repeatedly said that it was her fault for bringing him by the classroom. Torey told Claudia that it was definitely not her fault and that she could have never known that something like that was going to happen. Claudia started asking Torey if Boo will ever get better, and asked about the other children that come to their classroom. She tells Torey that her father told her it was a class for crazy kids before they have to be locked up as adults. She says, "I always thought crazy people were bad. Like Jack the Ripper or Son of Sam. I was scared to even think about them. But that isn't the way it really is, is it? Boo isn't bad. Or Tom or Lori." (pg. 302). They then go on to discuss whether or not people are good or bad, and Torey tells Claudia that no one is good or bad, and that those are just words.
Claudia responds, "No one's really any different, are they? We're all just pretty much the same." (302).
I thought this chapter was fairly interesting. Boo has made so much progress throughout this book, and he hadn't had a real meltdown in quite some time. It just goes to show that no matter how much progress one has made with a student there are still going to be some unexpected situations. I feel like he had this outburst because of the construction materials that had been placed in the room that were way out of the norm. Aside from that, I would have no idea why he resorted to hurting himself in the process. It's pretty scary to think about being in a situation like that, and I don't think anything besides a similar experience could really prepare anyone for handling it. I just hope that I have the right tools, support systems, and instincts to handle the situation in a safe way for everyone involved.
Sunday, December 2, 2012
Chapter 30
In this chapter Torey talks about how the year is winding down, and how many of the classes/grades are having programs and plays to celebrate different events (Mother's Day, May Day, end of school year, etc.) Lori cannot stop singing the songs from the first grade program, because her sister Libby had taught her all of the words. Torey feels bad because she doesn't have the time to create a program for her own students. She talks about how she wishes she could help Lori and for Lori to have some kind of normalcy. She says:
"It must have been hard. Hard being seven and relegated to the never-never land of a class like this. Hard wanting to be like everyone else and never quite understanding why you couldn't be. I had underestimated Lori. I had believed that if I could get her away from all the pressure of things she was incapable of, away from the abuse and humiliation, that was all she needed. I was wrong. This was not where she wanted to be. My room was safer, easier, but it was second choice. If she had had her way--if she could have managed it--Lori would have been a "real" first grader." (pg. 292).
I think a case like Lori's would be almost more difficult than that of a child with severe mental limitations. In all other aspects besides reading, Lori is a 'normal' even BRIGHT child who is fully aware that she is being separated from others and made to feel different. I hope that I will be able to have a classroom where although everyone has different abilities and some have exceptionalities, everyone will still feel like they belong there.
Torey then brings her guitar. Lori decides that she wants to do an act in the upcoming talent show. The other students aren't very enthusiastic about it, and neither is Torey. They end up singing made up verses to "He's got the whole world in His hands", naming each of their small classroom's students as the song goes along. It was a very united moment for Torey's small class.
"It must have been hard. Hard being seven and relegated to the never-never land of a class like this. Hard wanting to be like everyone else and never quite understanding why you couldn't be. I had underestimated Lori. I had believed that if I could get her away from all the pressure of things she was incapable of, away from the abuse and humiliation, that was all she needed. I was wrong. This was not where she wanted to be. My room was safer, easier, but it was second choice. If she had had her way--if she could have managed it--Lori would have been a "real" first grader." (pg. 292).
I think a case like Lori's would be almost more difficult than that of a child with severe mental limitations. In all other aspects besides reading, Lori is a 'normal' even BRIGHT child who is fully aware that she is being separated from others and made to feel different. I hope that I will be able to have a classroom where although everyone has different abilities and some have exceptionalities, everyone will still feel like they belong there.
Torey then brings her guitar. Lori decides that she wants to do an act in the upcoming talent show. The other students aren't very enthusiastic about it, and neither is Torey. They end up singing made up verses to "He's got the whole world in His hands", naming each of their small classroom's students as the song goes along. It was a very united moment for Torey's small class.
Chapter 29
In this chapter a woman named Ariadne Boom comes into Torey's classroom. She came from the state Office of Public Instruction. Torey talks about how Ariadne was known for always jumping on different bandwagons and right then she was specifically interested in special education classrooms, so she was making 'a tour' of different classrooms and was assigned to observe Torey. Torey becomes very nervous but things go well overall. When she talks to Ariadne the toughest thing she was asked was which educational model she adhered to. Torey did not know, because she didn't really have a specific philosophy that she followed. She just tried new things when others didn't seem to be working, and kept using certain tactics that were effective.
As much as I am interested in different teaching philosophies, psychologist theories, and so on, when you actually get into a school it is going to be a whole different world. Sure I think there will be times that in hindsight will match up with a certain philosophy or some theory, but I highly doubt I will consciously be trying to align every action I take with a certain textbook philosophy. This is why I think although college class experiences are good, it is the field experience and practicums that will really get us ready for what we are going to have to do in a school setting. It's nice to know some of the background information, but every teacher is going to have slightly different goals from others, and those goals will always be changing.
As much as I am interested in different teaching philosophies, psychologist theories, and so on, when you actually get into a school it is going to be a whole different world. Sure I think there will be times that in hindsight will match up with a certain philosophy or some theory, but I highly doubt I will consciously be trying to align every action I take with a certain textbook philosophy. This is why I think although college class experiences are good, it is the field experience and practicums that will really get us ready for what we are going to have to do in a school setting. It's nice to know some of the background information, but every teacher is going to have slightly different goals from others, and those goals will always be changing.
Chapter 28
In this chapter Torey discusses some of the progress of her students. Lori is actually excelling in all of her subjects (besides reading and writing of course). She tries to give Lori as many activities that don't involve reading as possible. When something requires reading, Tomaso will do the reading or writing for Lori, and Lori will tell him what to write.
Tomaso is also making progress. He no longer uses vulgar language (or at least almost none). He is able to control his temper much better and does not become as quickly frustrated with tasks as he used to. He still talks about his father as though he is alive, but it is becoming less and less. As far as reading goes, he has learned 18 months of reading skills in 6 months. Math is still somewhat of a struggle. He understands basic concepts but gets confused when he is faced with word problems, as he is not sure how the words related to the equations he is used to.
As a math TA this is something that I see a lot (having trouble taking information from word problems to set up equations). I think that so many teachers throughout the years try to ignore a lot of the word problems (at least in my schools). Many of the teachers would assign them as extra credit, and proclaim them to be more difficult which immediately discouraged the students from ever wanting to solve them. The key is really to break the problem up step by step, pulling out tiny bits of information as you read along.
Claudia missed a full week of school, and when Torey tried to get a hold of her family no one would answer. When Claudia returned the next week she looked ill, but went to work as usual. Claudia informed Torey that she started seeing a psychiatrist and that she was happy about it. Torey was happy to hear this but was still worried as something seemed off. When Claudia told her more about the psychiatrist she was seeing and how her parents decided to let her talk to someone, she casually revealed to Torey that she had tried to kill herself the weekend before. I thought this was interesting because through the whole book Torey had talked about her worries about Claudia and how she was sure she was suffering from some sort of depression (of course, this is all written in hindsight, so who knows how many of the signs she actually noticed at the time, but still).
It makes me really sad to know that there are CHILDREN who try to commit suicide. Although this is a tragedy no matter the age, it really bothers me that a child, whose life is supposed to be simple and care-free, could hate the world or themselves so much that they don't feel like they can go on any longer.
Tomaso is also making progress. He no longer uses vulgar language (or at least almost none). He is able to control his temper much better and does not become as quickly frustrated with tasks as he used to. He still talks about his father as though he is alive, but it is becoming less and less. As far as reading goes, he has learned 18 months of reading skills in 6 months. Math is still somewhat of a struggle. He understands basic concepts but gets confused when he is faced with word problems, as he is not sure how the words related to the equations he is used to.
As a math TA this is something that I see a lot (having trouble taking information from word problems to set up equations). I think that so many teachers throughout the years try to ignore a lot of the word problems (at least in my schools). Many of the teachers would assign them as extra credit, and proclaim them to be more difficult which immediately discouraged the students from ever wanting to solve them. The key is really to break the problem up step by step, pulling out tiny bits of information as you read along.
Claudia missed a full week of school, and when Torey tried to get a hold of her family no one would answer. When Claudia returned the next week she looked ill, but went to work as usual. Claudia informed Torey that she started seeing a psychiatrist and that she was happy about it. Torey was happy to hear this but was still worried as something seemed off. When Claudia told her more about the psychiatrist she was seeing and how her parents decided to let her talk to someone, she casually revealed to Torey that she had tried to kill herself the weekend before. I thought this was interesting because through the whole book Torey had talked about her worries about Claudia and how she was sure she was suffering from some sort of depression (of course, this is all written in hindsight, so who knows how many of the signs she actually noticed at the time, but still).
It makes me really sad to know that there are CHILDREN who try to commit suicide. Although this is a tragedy no matter the age, it really bothers me that a child, whose life is supposed to be simple and care-free, could hate the world or themselves so much that they don't feel like they can go on any longer.
Chapter 27
This chapter was rather short. Torey meets with the administrators as well as Lori's general education teacher. She reflects on the fact that because her and Edna do not and will not see eye-to-eye on many things, she will never really know her as a person but rather as her stubborn co-worker. This in itself although not necessarily specific to education is something that I liked to think about. It is amazing how we have certain thoughts about certain people in a professional sense, whether it be our co-workers, professors, classmates, or the waitress that waited on my family's table the other night. We often do not take the time to think about what their home lives are like. What have they gone through today? What have they been through during their lifetime? It's a good lesson for anyone to take the time and think about what other people have had to go through before giving them a hard time, or even any lack of compassion.
They decided to let Torey continue with her modified curriculum for Lori. They decided that Lori's chances of reading because of her injury were extremely low, and that she should continue to focus on other subjects rather than focus on reading and become behind in everything. I think that this was a wise decision. Although it is tough for many people to imagine not even trying to teach a child to read anymore, sometimes I think there are more important things to think about, and is the price of teaching them to read going to be worth it if it damages many other aspects of the child's life?
They decided to let Torey continue with her modified curriculum for Lori. They decided that Lori's chances of reading because of her injury were extremely low, and that she should continue to focus on other subjects rather than focus on reading and become behind in everything. I think that this was a wise decision. Although it is tough for many people to imagine not even trying to teach a child to read anymore, sometimes I think there are more important things to think about, and is the price of teaching them to read going to be worth it if it damages many other aspects of the child's life?
Chapter 26
In this chapter, Edna Thorsen (Lori's general education teacher) finds out that Torey has not been teaching with the provided reading curriculum, and hasn't even been teaching reading at all. This is brought to the principal's attention, who confronts Torey. Torey becomes very frustrated and sarcastic, so the principal decides that he is going to set up a meeting with the special education director. Torey insists the Lori is simply not developmentally ready for reading yet, with her brain injuries, but is excelling at many other subjects and is in fact very bright.
Torey discusses her dislike for the mainstreaming law (which we now implement more and more). I thought that it was interesting to hear her take on it because we are only told of the very positive outcomes of it (because our textbook definitely promotes it). She says:
"To try one's hardest, to constantly be putting out one's best effort and always be the stupidest kid in the class, as in the case of the slow-learning child, was emotionally devastating. And for kids like mine who had skewed perceptions of the world or who needed intense, provocative interactions in the classroom, there was no way this could be given to them with thirty other children and a harried teacher. For them the law could be slow death." (pg. 259).
Although I do agree with a lot of the mainstreaming, I do think that it can make things more difficult for some students IF the wrong sorts of emphasis are being placed on certain skills rather than focusing on their strengths. I think that since this book has been written there have been a lot of improvements made with this law, and that there are more curricula that cater to students with many different needs. It is important that we are utilizing these types of curricula rather than on those that only focus that are performing at grade-level and have no significant trouble with specific skills.
Torey discusses her dislike for the mainstreaming law (which we now implement more and more). I thought that it was interesting to hear her take on it because we are only told of the very positive outcomes of it (because our textbook definitely promotes it). She says:
"To try one's hardest, to constantly be putting out one's best effort and always be the stupidest kid in the class, as in the case of the slow-learning child, was emotionally devastating. And for kids like mine who had skewed perceptions of the world or who needed intense, provocative interactions in the classroom, there was no way this could be given to them with thirty other children and a harried teacher. For them the law could be slow death." (pg. 259).
Although I do agree with a lot of the mainstreaming, I do think that it can make things more difficult for some students IF the wrong sorts of emphasis are being placed on certain skills rather than focusing on their strengths. I think that since this book has been written there have been a lot of improvements made with this law, and that there are more curricula that cater to students with many different needs. It is important that we are utilizing these types of curricula rather than on those that only focus that are performing at grade-level and have no significant trouble with specific skills.
Chapter 25
Torey has a break through with Tomaso in this chapter. Tomaso comes into class one day with a bull fighter statue, and starts telling everyone that his father made it for him, and could make anything that he asked him to (his father is deceased). When Claudia confronts him and tells him that there is no way that his father made it but was from a store, Tomaso becomes very upset and insists that Torey say something to Claudia for calling Tomaso a liar. Torey pulls Tomaso off to the side and tells Tomaso that sometimes it's okay to make up stories for ourselves in order to feel better, and that sometimes stories make us feel better than reality. Tomaso finally notes the fact that his father is dead, and also acknowledges the fact that he understands that Torey must have known this all along. He asks Torey why people die, and says that he wishes that would never happen.
We also hear about Tomaso's experience when his father died, and how his stepmother killed him. We then hear that Tomaso has a brother named Cesar, and does not know where he is. Although there has been a breakthrough with Tomaso finally acknowledging his father's death, at the end of the chapter he says, "My father didn't really make that for me. I made it myself at Boys' Club. That was dumb of me to say. My father couldn't make it. He's away in Spain right now, looking for a home for me and him. Why, probably right now he's found one and pretty soon he'll come get me". (pg. 253).
This chapter was extremely sad, and really makes one realize that not all children's lives are surrounded by happiness, safety, and love. It is amazing to hear some of the stories from children of what they have already gone through in their short lives. There is so much violence experie. nced by innocent children and it makes me extremely devastated. I have heard many stories of abuse and spousal violence. There was actually someone from my town who's father killed their mother. I could not imagine what it would be like to have been in a situation like that. This chapter also reminded me of some of the stories we read in our diversity class last semester about some of the refugee students. So many children have heard and seen things that they should never have to experience. It's important for all of us to remember this, and to try and make school at least one safe place for them to go.
We also hear about Tomaso's experience when his father died, and how his stepmother killed him. We then hear that Tomaso has a brother named Cesar, and does not know where he is. Although there has been a breakthrough with Tomaso finally acknowledging his father's death, at the end of the chapter he says, "My father didn't really make that for me. I made it myself at Boys' Club. That was dumb of me to say. My father couldn't make it. He's away in Spain right now, looking for a home for me and him. Why, probably right now he's found one and pretty soon he'll come get me". (pg. 253).
This chapter was extremely sad, and really makes one realize that not all children's lives are surrounded by happiness, safety, and love. It is amazing to hear some of the stories from children of what they have already gone through in their short lives. There is so much violence experie. nced by innocent children and it makes me extremely devastated. I have heard many stories of abuse and spousal violence. There was actually someone from my town who's father killed their mother. I could not imagine what it would be like to have been in a situation like that. This chapter also reminded me of some of the stories we read in our diversity class last semester about some of the refugee students. So many children have heard and seen things that they should never have to experience. It's important for all of us to remember this, and to try and make school at least one safe place for them to go.
Chapter 24
Lori has finally come back to school, and Torey has made some drastic and not-quite-approved changes. She is no longer going to be focusing on teaching Lori reading, writing, or spelling. Instead she rips all of the reading materials for Lori apart and throws them in the garbage, to show Lori how serious she was about other skills being just as important if not more than reading. Lori becomes somewhat upset because she DOES want to learn to read, and doesn't want Torey to give up on her. Torey tells her that people are like hyacinth bulbs (the ones they planted earlier in the year). They need to sit and grow roots first, before blooming. She tells Lori that we can't always see the roots growing, but they're growing just the same. Torey says that she is not giving up, and that they will try to help her read, but for now they are going to focus on other things so that Lori can create roots all the while.
I think that this is a good strategy. Since there seems to be no improvement with the reading and Lori already doesn't want to come to school, I think that making her as comfortable as possible in school and helping her to learn other skills is still being productive. I just hope that along the line Torey or someone else was able to help reading 'click' for Lori.
Claudia is still a concern for Torey, and she realizes that she is going to have to be the only resource Claudia has involving pregnancy questions, or questions about anything else for that matter. When Claudia finds a Cosmopolitan magazine, she starts asking Torey some interesting questions about one of the articles. To her surprise, sex is supposed to feel good. Something that really made me think was when Claudia said, "You're supposed to WANT to have sex? Wow, I sure never knew that. I thought it was just something you did because you had to, to get a guy to like you and not leave you for somebody else. I sure didn't know you were supposed to feel good doing it." (pg. 243). It made me sad to think that there are girls who think that they need to do certain things in order to keep boys happy. I've seen examples way too many times, and although there has been more sex education I feel that there needs to be more education about the emotional side of things.
I think that this is a good strategy. Since there seems to be no improvement with the reading and Lori already doesn't want to come to school, I think that making her as comfortable as possible in school and helping her to learn other skills is still being productive. I just hope that along the line Torey or someone else was able to help reading 'click' for Lori.
Claudia is still a concern for Torey, and she realizes that she is going to have to be the only resource Claudia has involving pregnancy questions, or questions about anything else for that matter. When Claudia finds a Cosmopolitan magazine, she starts asking Torey some interesting questions about one of the articles. To her surprise, sex is supposed to feel good. Something that really made me think was when Claudia said, "You're supposed to WANT to have sex? Wow, I sure never knew that. I thought it was just something you did because you had to, to get a guy to like you and not leave you for somebody else. I sure didn't know you were supposed to feel good doing it." (pg. 243). It made me sad to think that there are girls who think that they need to do certain things in order to keep boys happy. I've seen examples way too many times, and although there has been more sex education I feel that there needs to be more education about the emotional side of things.
Chapter 23
The staff at the school and Torey come to the decision that if Lori does come back to school, she will be in Torey's classroom almost full time while still officially being on Edna's class roster. Lori will stay in Torey's room for all subjects except for physical education, music, and social studies. When Torey contacts Lori's father, he tells her that he can't bring himself to force Lori to go to school, but Torey tells him that the best thing for Lori is to come back, and that she can't make things right if Lori isn't there. Finally it is agreed that Torey will come to their home for a visit. When she does, Lori is pretty upset and tells her to go away. She tells Torey that she is never going back to school because of what Edna did to her, and basically that no one was going to make her. Torey tells Lori that she is sorry that everyone made reading out to be more important than it really is. She tells Lori that she has so many other gifts and talents and she just happens to have a hard time with reading. At the end of the chapter Lori seems to be somewhat more convinced to come back to school.
It is devastating to think about a child not wanting to come to school because they feel like they are vulnerable to humiliation not just from their peers but coming from their own TEACHER. Teachers should always be striving to make students feel safe, not to make them feel stupid and like a complete failure. One of the things we talked about in our EDUC 250 class is about the downfalls of "popcorn reading", where students read aloud one at a time from a certain story/passage. I think that this does more harm than good, and that there are plenty of opportunities for students to read aloud without having to feel humiliated if they don't get through a chapter. There are many things teachers can do in order to promote a POSITIVE learning environment for all of their students. I know I will take these things into consideration when creating my own teaching philosophy and classroom structure.
It is devastating to think about a child not wanting to come to school because they feel like they are vulnerable to humiliation not just from their peers but coming from their own TEACHER. Teachers should always be striving to make students feel safe, not to make them feel stupid and like a complete failure. One of the things we talked about in our EDUC 250 class is about the downfalls of "popcorn reading", where students read aloud one at a time from a certain story/passage. I think that this does more harm than good, and that there are plenty of opportunities for students to read aloud without having to feel humiliated if they don't get through a chapter. There are many things teachers can do in order to promote a POSITIVE learning environment for all of their students. I know I will take these things into consideration when creating my own teaching philosophy and classroom structure.
Chapter 22
Libby continues to come to Torey's room to pick up Lori's homework, even though Torey has told her previously that Lori does not have any homework that would come from her class. Libby ends up asking Torey some tough questions about Lori. She asks if Lori is retarded, to which Torey replies that she is not, and that she is still good at many other things but that she just has a hard time with reading. Torey gets Libby to tell her what REALLY happened the day of the breakdown. Libby tells Torey that Mrs. Thorsen was making Lori read in front of everyone in the class, even though she knew she wasn't able to read very well. Not only did she do this, but she gave her one of the books from the higher reading groups. When Lori couldn't read it, she gave her an easier book. She continued to giver her "babier and babier" books. By the time Lori was given a book that she could read, she was so nervous that she threw up. Libby told Torey that Mrs. Thorsen never even said that she was sorry. She also told Torey that sometimes she (Libby) spits at Mrs. Thorsen, and says that someday she is going to spit in her face.
Libby also reveals more information about their original parents, and how her father and mother used to beat both of them but that he would beat Lori until she completely stopped crying. She also told Torey about a time when her father broke her (Libby's) arm, and it was so bad that they had to go to the hospital. He told her to tell the doctor that she fell down the stairs. Then she told Torey that someday she was going to find her real father and kill him for what he did to Lori.
This chapter was really sad to read. It is interesting to her the perspective of the sibling of someone with a disability. I think that often times these children are overlooked during the whole process, and are expected to always "be fine" no matter what happens. We have to remember how a child's situation is affecting everyone around them as well.
Libby also reveals more information about their original parents, and how her father and mother used to beat both of them but that he would beat Lori until she completely stopped crying. She also told Torey about a time when her father broke her (Libby's) arm, and it was so bad that they had to go to the hospital. He told her to tell the doctor that she fell down the stairs. Then she told Torey that someday she was going to find her real father and kill him for what he did to Lori.
This chapter was really sad to read. It is interesting to her the perspective of the sibling of someone with a disability. I think that often times these children are overlooked during the whole process, and are expected to always "be fine" no matter what happens. We have to remember how a child's situation is affecting everyone around them as well.
Chapter 21
Lori has still not come back to school after her 'episode'. Her twin sister Libby now comes to pick up her homework, and her father does not know what to do. On the first day that Lori does not show up, Tomaso is extremely upset, and Boo even shows that he is concerned about where Lori is. He starts running around saying "What letter is this?", something that Torey always says to Lori. He also grabs the Valentine's Day book that Lori made from him and insists on showing them the pictures and naming what is there, he looks at them expectantly as if he is waiting for them to do what he is asking. I think that this shows that since there has been even the slightest disruption of some kind of normalcy in Boo's day (him being used to Lori's presence, and now she is gone), he is trying to figure out where she could possibly be. The fact that she is not there probably does not make sense to him, since she has never missed a day.
When the staff talks to Lori's father, Edna (Lori's general education teacher) paints a pretty bleak picture about Lori's situation. They go on to suggest many different types of help, to which Lori's father counter-suggests other options. Torey sits and does not say anything. One quote I liked from this section was:
"If Lori had been blind or deaf or without arms we would be brutes for bludgeoning her into a breakdown, but because she had a disability no one could see, we were able to put the blame on her. And we could sit here guiltlessly and do what professionals are so good at doing: playing God." (pg. 212).
I thought this was a good representation of how people used to deal with things like learning disabilities. It shows that since it was something that was not understood, it was easy to put blame on the students for their failures rather than on the teachers/staff for not recognizing a way to help the student succeed.
When the staff talks to Lori's father, Edna (Lori's general education teacher) paints a pretty bleak picture about Lori's situation. They go on to suggest many different types of help, to which Lori's father counter-suggests other options. Torey sits and does not say anything. One quote I liked from this section was:
"If Lori had been blind or deaf or without arms we would be brutes for bludgeoning her into a breakdown, but because she had a disability no one could see, we were able to put the blame on her. And we could sit here guiltlessly and do what professionals are so good at doing: playing God." (pg. 212).
I thought this was a good representation of how people used to deal with things like learning disabilities. It shows that since it was something that was not understood, it was easy to put blame on the students for their failures rather than on the teachers/staff for not recognizing a way to help the student succeed.
Chapter 20
Torey went for a four hour drive/exploring after her frustrating day with Lori and the other children. She was so relaxed from it that she didn't even think about the day. She just wanted to have some time to herself to really be calm. When she got home, Joc was there and was very angry with her, as they had been invited to an anniversary dinner but had to miss it because Torey had forgotten and not arrived home until two hours after the party started. Joc went on another rampage about how Torey is obsessed with crazy, and told her that she is not that important at her job and that she had a "God complex". He left, and Torey said that she knew this argument would be their last, so I'm guessing they broke up officially. This was interesting, because I thought they had already broken up, and the whole book she talks about how she was not going to end up with him, so I am always wondering when the REAL end of their relationship happens. I think that this time it is the final break up. Once again, this book shows an example of how frustrating and stressful working with certain situations can be, and how sometimes we need to be able to make time for ourselves to relax and not worry about what happened. I hope that my relationship with my significant other will always stay strong, and that he will continue to have an understanding for the emotions that will come home with me (and for me to have that same understanding for him).
Chapter 19
This chapter revolves around a Lori breakdown. Torey hears a scream and Lori ends up running into the classroom and hiding under an art cabinet. She does not stop sobbing for a very long time. When her general education teacher and the principal finally come to Torey's room, they tell her that everything was normal and that Lori was goofing off, and when the teacher yelled at her she ended up throwing up and running out of the room screaming. Edna, the general education teacher, insists that Lori is crazy. She also wants the principal to call a mental hospital and have Lori be taken away, because she feels that there is no point having a crazy person in the classroom. Torey convinces them to let Lori stay in her room until she feels better.
Lori stays in the room pretty much all day, and the other children (Tomaso and Claudia) are upset. Torey becomes frustrated when Tomaso keeps trying to talk to Lori, to which he responds, "But she needs me!". This once again shows how strong of a bond Tomaso and Lori now share.
Lori stays under the art cabinet all day. When all of the students have left and Lori's father has been called to come get her, Torey sits by Lori and starts singing. After awhile Lori finally comes out to be held by Torey, and Torey tells her that she won't let anything bad happen to her and that they will get through anything together.
I found this situation to be very interesting, and once again it is something that one does not usually think about when they imagine their 'perfect' career as an educator. Then I realize that this is all a part of the job, and that we have to be ready for any kind of situation, and not knowing why students do certain things but just to try to be there to help them through whatever they are going through. I think sometimes it is important to remember that we are not always going to understand why students are doing things, but that it is important to show them that no matter what, we care about them, and we are going to make them feel safe.
Lori stays in the room pretty much all day, and the other children (Tomaso and Claudia) are upset. Torey becomes frustrated when Tomaso keeps trying to talk to Lori, to which he responds, "But she needs me!". This once again shows how strong of a bond Tomaso and Lori now share.
Lori stays under the art cabinet all day. When all of the students have left and Lori's father has been called to come get her, Torey sits by Lori and starts singing. After awhile Lori finally comes out to be held by Torey, and Torey tells her that she won't let anything bad happen to her and that they will get through anything together.
I found this situation to be very interesting, and once again it is something that one does not usually think about when they imagine their 'perfect' career as an educator. Then I realize that this is all a part of the job, and that we have to be ready for any kind of situation, and not knowing why students do certain things but just to try to be there to help them through whatever they are going through. I think sometimes it is important to remember that we are not always going to understand why students are doing things, but that it is important to show them that no matter what, we care about them, and we are going to make them feel safe.
Chapter 18
Torey notices that things have changed with Tomaso. Although he still frequently becomes angry, there are no more violent outbursts and there seems to be an understanding between him and Torey. I really liked what she said about this milestone, which was, "We both knew now how bad things could get between us and not damage the relationship. The test by fire had come and we had survived it." (pg. 180). I really liked this quote because it shows how Tomaso thought of relationships in general, and that if one bad thing happened the relationships would be over. This also shows how his past relationships have gone, which is why he is so distrusting towards everyone he meets.
The next part of the chapter talks about Claudia, and how Torey is still very concerned about her. She feels that Claudia is most likely dealing with depression, and wants to find some kind of support for her. When she calls Claudia's mother, she simply laughs and tells Torey that it is just an adolescent phase. When Torey tries to find a support group for Claudia, she cannot find anyone willing to help. She almost finds a group held at a high school for pregnant girls to talk to each other, but they tell Torey that Claudia is too young for such mature subjects. I found this somewhat funny because if Claudia is already pregnant, she clearly knows about some of the subjects being talked about already. A quote I found interesting from this part of the chapter came from Torey discussing the issue with the school nurse:
"The problem, she feels, is in Claudia's age, not her pregnancy. No one wants to acknowledge that a young child can and will get pregnant. As in such areas as physical or sexual abuse of children, the issue is too shocking to allow most people to accept it as a problem to be worked on. Maybe if they ignore it, it will go away." (pg. 186).
It is sad to hear that at this time in our country people just wanted to ignore such a serious issue, where girls who are already in a tough situation become ignored and have no support. Although I feel that pregnancies for VERY young girls is still pretty taboo, I think people are better about getting girls educated on what they need to do if they get pregnant, and there are a lot more preventative measures being taken with sex education in schools, so that young girls will actually understand what outcomes are possible. I understand that this is still a touchy subject for a lot of parents, but it is my hope that more education will help lower rates of teen pregnancies and sexually transmitted diseases. The situation presented in the book is a prime example of why we cannot be ignoring these children in need.
The next part of the chapter talks about Claudia, and how Torey is still very concerned about her. She feels that Claudia is most likely dealing with depression, and wants to find some kind of support for her. When she calls Claudia's mother, she simply laughs and tells Torey that it is just an adolescent phase. When Torey tries to find a support group for Claudia, she cannot find anyone willing to help. She almost finds a group held at a high school for pregnant girls to talk to each other, but they tell Torey that Claudia is too young for such mature subjects. I found this somewhat funny because if Claudia is already pregnant, she clearly knows about some of the subjects being talked about already. A quote I found interesting from this part of the chapter came from Torey discussing the issue with the school nurse:
"The problem, she feels, is in Claudia's age, not her pregnancy. No one wants to acknowledge that a young child can and will get pregnant. As in such areas as physical or sexual abuse of children, the issue is too shocking to allow most people to accept it as a problem to be worked on. Maybe if they ignore it, it will go away." (pg. 186).
It is sad to hear that at this time in our country people just wanted to ignore such a serious issue, where girls who are already in a tough situation become ignored and have no support. Although I feel that pregnancies for VERY young girls is still pretty taboo, I think people are better about getting girls educated on what they need to do if they get pregnant, and there are a lot more preventative measures being taken with sex education in schools, so that young girls will actually understand what outcomes are possible. I understand that this is still a touchy subject for a lot of parents, but it is my hope that more education will help lower rates of teen pregnancies and sexually transmitted diseases. The situation presented in the book is a prime example of why we cannot be ignoring these children in need.
Chapter 17
This chapter discussed Tomaso's birthday, and how Torey's students helped make a 'party' for him. Tomaso was so excited to have a party just for him, and told everyone that NO ONE had ever thrown him a party, "Not ever." Of course this made me sad to read this, because it is just another reminder of how different childhood can be for some children in comparison to myself or others. It really makes one take the time to think about potential students and remembering that not everyone gets to have a special celebration, whether it be because their guardians can't afford it or simply don't care enough to make the effort. Lori was especially excited because she had gotten Tomaso a present. When he opened it, everything turned to chaos. It was a teddy bear. Previously Tomaso had mentioned that he had had a teddy bear and that it had been taken away by a bigger boy when he was little. Lori thought the bear was a good gift because she knew that his old bear had meant a lot to him. Tomaso yelled at Lori, telling her that she was stupid and that it was a baby gift, etc., clearly feeling like he had to maintain some dignity of some display of manhood. Tomaso took a scissors and stabbed the bear, ripping out a large portion of its stuffing. When Torey tried to calm Tomaso down, he told her to shut up, and ended up taking the scissors and holding it against her gut, threatening to hurt her. Things stayed silent in the classroom for a seemingly long time as he held the scissors against Torey, and finally he dropped the scissors and started crying. Torey held him for a long time, and when the day was finally over Tomaso came up to her and asked if she could fix the bear. When she said she could, Tomaso and Lori insisted that they stay after school until Torey was done stitching up the bear. Lori told Torey that she realized that Torey doesn't really care if things don't always work out so well. At the end of the chapter, Tomaso asks Torey if she loves him, to which she replies, "Yes. I guess that's another way of saying it." (pg. 178).
This is definitely showing that Tomaso is realizing that no matter how much he 'does wrong', Torey will still care about him and want him to be okay. This was a very touching part of the book because Torey is finally making more of an emotional connection with Tomaso, which she has been trying to make for a long time. I hope that I will be able to make these types of connections with even my most difficult students, as this bond helps make other things run much more smoothly.
This is definitely showing that Tomaso is realizing that no matter how much he 'does wrong', Torey will still care about him and want him to be okay. This was a very touching part of the book because Torey is finally making more of an emotional connection with Tomaso, which she has been trying to make for a long time. I hope that I will be able to make these types of connections with even my most difficult students, as this bond helps make other things run much more smoothly.
Tuesday, November 27, 2012
Chapter 16
In this chapter, some progress was made with Boo. Lori was very anxious about Valentine's day, so she had brought in many decorations for the classroom, as well as some valentines for Torey, Tomaso, Boo, and Claudia. When Torey asked if she should put the cards in a folder until it was actually Valentine's Day, Lori insisted that everyone read their card now, and that her dad would buy her "store valentines" for the actual day when she had to give them to her general education classroom as well. Boo's card was actually more of a book of pictures. Lori had cut out pictures of animals in magazines and drawn some in as well, When Boo was looking through it, he pointed at a dog and said, "Doggie". This was extremely exciting for everyone in the room, and so they pointed out other animals. Tomaso would point to an animal and correct Boo until he got it right, and then move onto the next one. Boo was actually able to identify animals when asked by the others, and Lori was so happy she said "I feel like laughing and crying all at the same time." Of course, this eventually came to an end and Boo went back to doing what he normally did, not responding to anyone's questions and remaining in his own world. Lori was so disappointed because she thought she had finally "fixed him". Torey reassured Lori and told her that it was because of her gift that Boo had spoke to them.
I think this chapter was a good example of small steps of progress. Sometimes we are going to feel like there has been vast improvement in a student, and the next minute things will have gone back to normal. I think it is important to remember how special these MOMENTS are, even if they are not necessarily built upon right. The fact that they even happen means we are doing something right, and we should not always feel disappointment when things don't remain perfect.
I think this chapter was a good example of small steps of progress. Sometimes we are going to feel like there has been vast improvement in a student, and the next minute things will have gone back to normal. I think it is important to remember how special these MOMENTS are, even if they are not necessarily built upon right. The fact that they even happen means we are doing something right, and we should not always feel disappointment when things don't remain perfect.
Chapter 15
Torey decides to talk to Claudia about her plans for the baby. She ends up overstepping her boundaries and asking what Claudia is going to do with it, and if she had considered putting the baby up for adoption. This makes Claudia upset with Torey and she wonders how Torey could even suggest something like that. She thinks that everything will be okay and that someone will always have time to help with the baby. Claudia also said that the baby was going to fix everything. Then asks Torey why she even cares, because nobody else does, and that everyone in Torey's classroom are just "somebody else's kids", which is where I assume the title of this book came from. This was an interesting conversation because Torey knew she had overstepped and made Claudia feel bad, but she also wanted Claudia to realize how things would really be if she kept the baby, and that the chance of her dropping out of school was becoming higher and higher.
I think this is a tough call as far as talking to students and giving them input on certain topics. This is probably something I would talk with them about, but I doubt I would give them any input on what to do in certain situations. For my safety and to not hurt their feelings it is not really my place to put my opinion in their lives. Although there are times where input might be helpful, this would probably be one of those times that a student-teacher relationship isn't really close enough to put my own ideas towards.
Lori brought Torey a drawing she made, and had a beautiful quote. She was talking about how it didn't come out perfect like she was thinking, and Torey told her not to say that and that it was better than any old photograph. That's when Lori said, "What I was thinking about was: It is perfect. Not the part you see but what's inside you. In my head, I could see this bird perfect. And that's sort of enough for me to like this picture even though it isn't really very perfect. Because...well, because I kind of know it could be..." (pg. 155). Then she said "Things never really are perfect, but inside you, you can always see them perfect, if you try. That makes things beautiful to me".
It is amazing the profound things children can say, not even knowing how big of an impact their innocent words can mean to those around them.
I think this is a tough call as far as talking to students and giving them input on certain topics. This is probably something I would talk with them about, but I doubt I would give them any input on what to do in certain situations. For my safety and to not hurt their feelings it is not really my place to put my opinion in their lives. Although there are times where input might be helpful, this would probably be one of those times that a student-teacher relationship isn't really close enough to put my own ideas towards.
Lori brought Torey a drawing she made, and had a beautiful quote. She was talking about how it didn't come out perfect like she was thinking, and Torey told her not to say that and that it was better than any old photograph. That's when Lori said, "What I was thinking about was: It is perfect. Not the part you see but what's inside you. In my head, I could see this bird perfect. And that's sort of enough for me to like this picture even though it isn't really very perfect. Because...well, because I kind of know it could be..." (pg. 155). Then she said "Things never really are perfect, but inside you, you can always see them perfect, if you try. That makes things beautiful to me".
It is amazing the profound things children can say, not even knowing how big of an impact their innocent words can mean to those around them.
Chapter 14
This was a relatively short chapter, that discussed two different incidents.
The first incident had to do with Lori, whom Torey thought was acting differently lately. She wasn't quite able to figure out exactly what was different, but she knew that Lori wasn't as jolly as she usually was. They had begun playing a card game with letters, which Lori had grown addicted to (it was basically "Go Fish" with different letters of the alphabet). Torey realized that as time had gone on, she was scared of letting Lori lose, so she had been purposely throwing the games for a long time. One day she was thinking about this, and Lori tried to match a card that wasn't actually a match. When Torey told her this, it made her very upset. Torey ended up winning, and Lori threw a huge fit, saying that the game was the only thing she was ever able to win at, and that Torey basically took that away from her.
I think sometimes it is difficult to find a balance between offering help and giving too much help, to the point where it really isn't helping the child but just a way for the teacher to deny that things aren't really getting much better. Torey talked about how she was in denial about Lori because she only wanted her to be happy, and deep down she knew that things were always going to be difficult for her.
Torey met with Claudia's parents to talk about her academic plan, and Claudia's father seemed very concerned about the classroom and the students Claudia is interacting with. He makes a comment about how Boo is a colored-boy, another about how Tomaso is a migrant child, and also makes negative comments about how sometimes Claudia helps with the other children. Torey realizes that she must be very careful in dealing with this situation. She does not want Claudia's father to pull her out of school and get a tutor because she feels that the last thing she needs is even more isolation, but she is also afraid that Claudia's father will find a reason to sue her.
This brings about another issue all teachers should be aware of, which is the communication with parents and the fact that not all parents are going to think everything the teacher does is the perfect choice. We must learn to make compromises when it comes to the family's belief system, and to deal with things in a mature way. I know that sometimes it will be hard for me when I disagree with some parents' opinions, but I have to continue to try and work with them and come up with the best plan for their child.
The first incident had to do with Lori, whom Torey thought was acting differently lately. She wasn't quite able to figure out exactly what was different, but she knew that Lori wasn't as jolly as she usually was. They had begun playing a card game with letters, which Lori had grown addicted to (it was basically "Go Fish" with different letters of the alphabet). Torey realized that as time had gone on, she was scared of letting Lori lose, so she had been purposely throwing the games for a long time. One day she was thinking about this, and Lori tried to match a card that wasn't actually a match. When Torey told her this, it made her very upset. Torey ended up winning, and Lori threw a huge fit, saying that the game was the only thing she was ever able to win at, and that Torey basically took that away from her.
I think sometimes it is difficult to find a balance between offering help and giving too much help, to the point where it really isn't helping the child but just a way for the teacher to deny that things aren't really getting much better. Torey talked about how she was in denial about Lori because she only wanted her to be happy, and deep down she knew that things were always going to be difficult for her.
Torey met with Claudia's parents to talk about her academic plan, and Claudia's father seemed very concerned about the classroom and the students Claudia is interacting with. He makes a comment about how Boo is a colored-boy, another about how Tomaso is a migrant child, and also makes negative comments about how sometimes Claudia helps with the other children. Torey realizes that she must be very careful in dealing with this situation. She does not want Claudia's father to pull her out of school and get a tutor because she feels that the last thing she needs is even more isolation, but she is also afraid that Claudia's father will find a reason to sue her.
This brings about another issue all teachers should be aware of, which is the communication with parents and the fact that not all parents are going to think everything the teacher does is the perfect choice. We must learn to make compromises when it comes to the family's belief system, and to deal with things in a mature way. I know that sometimes it will be hard for me when I disagree with some parents' opinions, but I have to continue to try and work with them and come up with the best plan for their child.
Chapter 13
In this chapter Tomaso shows even more of a connection with Lori, and how he can even have a protective instinct kick in when it comes to her. Lori was talking about her brand new doll she received for Christmas to the point where it was excessive. Torey noticed that Tomaso was very polite during the whole thing, and complimented him for being polite about it. When she said this, Tomaso told her, "You know, once I had this teddy bear and I liked him a whole lot. I was always showing him around and junk. So I know how it is. Little kids are like that. I was myself." This was a very touching moment because Tomaso, who is usually quick to make fun of things and put others down, defended Lori and her innocence.
Torey was also having a hard time figuring out Claudia. When she finally received her file, all it said was that she was painfully shy and that her parents were cold and competitive. She had grades and scores far above average but not quite to a 'gifted' level. Torey said something during this chapter that I really liked. She said:
"This kind of child made me so damned frustrated. Why didn't anyone ever see them? How could they sit and rot for years in classrooms without someone noticing them? They were invisible kids. Claudia was in as much trouble emotionally as Tomaso was. Yet, in the current state of the art, if one were bothersome, one usually gained attention and subsequently treatment. On the other hand, one could kill oneself quietly and as long as one did not disturb anybody else doing it, no one noticed. Or cared."
I really liked this quote because it is something I have thought so much about before. We seem to pay all of this attention to the kids who openly struggle and are much louder and boisterous about their problems, when there are so many students who have just as serious of issues that don't show the stereotypical signs. I hope that as a future educator I will be able to be fair in my treatment of all students and hopefully notice signs of students who maybe aren't as obviously struggling, but just need someone to talk to.
Torey was also having a hard time figuring out Claudia. When she finally received her file, all it said was that she was painfully shy and that her parents were cold and competitive. She had grades and scores far above average but not quite to a 'gifted' level. Torey said something during this chapter that I really liked. She said:
"This kind of child made me so damned frustrated. Why didn't anyone ever see them? How could they sit and rot for years in classrooms without someone noticing them? They were invisible kids. Claudia was in as much trouble emotionally as Tomaso was. Yet, in the current state of the art, if one were bothersome, one usually gained attention and subsequently treatment. On the other hand, one could kill oneself quietly and as long as one did not disturb anybody else doing it, no one noticed. Or cared."
I really liked this quote because it is something I have thought so much about before. We seem to pay all of this attention to the kids who openly struggle and are much louder and boisterous about their problems, when there are so many students who have just as serious of issues that don't show the stereotypical signs. I hope that as a future educator I will be able to be fair in my treatment of all students and hopefully notice signs of students who maybe aren't as obviously struggling, but just need someone to talk to.
Chapter 12
Torey now has a new student in her classroom. Her name is Claudia, and she is not very typical compared to the students Torey normally has assigned to her classroom. Claudia comes from a parochial school and is twelve years old. She is very well behaved, quiet, and a good student. When Torey asked why Claudia was being put into her classroom, the person in charge of placement told her that Claudia was pregnant. This of course was a shock to Torey since Claudia is only twelve years old, and Torey was not really sure how to deal with a pregnant student. Everyone reassured Torey that Claudia would be very easy to work with, and that she just wanted to be in a place where she wouldn't be noticed while she was pregnant. When Lori and Tomaso are told about Claudia, they are incredibly shocked and Tomaso is worried about talking about it in front of Lori and Boo, because it involved having sex. Torey thinks this is funny, since Tomaso says curse words all the time without ever thinking of how old Lori and Boo are and how it might affect them.
It is crazy to think that students getting pregnant at the very beginning of adolescence happens, but it happens all the time. This book has done a great job of making me think about all types of situations and how I would deal with them in my own classroom. I really feel sorry for Claudia and how embarrassed she was about her situation. Going to a Catholic school I'm sure she felt incredibly ashamed. I would want my students to know that they can come to me to talk without being judged about these types of things. I think all students no matter what they have done need someone who still appreciates them and what they are capable of, and knowing that even though they have gone through some tough situations they are cared for.
The other surprise for Torey came with Boo. Until this point Boo had never actually verbally communicated with anyone. He would only make some sounds and had delayed echolalia, but it was never directed at anyone in particular. This time, although it was still considered echolalia (he was repeating what someone else had told him), through that he told Torey and Lori about someone telling him not to touch the plug-ins in the wall. When they would ask him questions, he would elaborate with more echolalia.
It was nice to read this part of the story because it made me feel like Torey was finally making some progress with Boo, who is very misunderstood. I hope that I will be able to make the same types of progress with my future students, not matter how seemingly small.
It is crazy to think that students getting pregnant at the very beginning of adolescence happens, but it happens all the time. This book has done a great job of making me think about all types of situations and how I would deal with them in my own classroom. I really feel sorry for Claudia and how embarrassed she was about her situation. Going to a Catholic school I'm sure she felt incredibly ashamed. I would want my students to know that they can come to me to talk without being judged about these types of things. I think all students no matter what they have done need someone who still appreciates them and what they are capable of, and knowing that even though they have gone through some tough situations they are cared for.
The other surprise for Torey came with Boo. Until this point Boo had never actually verbally communicated with anyone. He would only make some sounds and had delayed echolalia, but it was never directed at anyone in particular. This time, although it was still considered echolalia (he was repeating what someone else had told him), through that he told Torey and Lori about someone telling him not to touch the plug-ins in the wall. When they would ask him questions, he would elaborate with more echolalia.
It was nice to read this part of the story because it made me feel like Torey was finally making some progress with Boo, who is very misunderstood. I hope that I will be able to make the same types of progress with my future students, not matter how seemingly small.
Chapter 11
This chapter doesn't really talk about the students too much, but Torey does talk more about her relationship with Joc. In the book this takes place over Christmas break. The two of them had just thrown a nice Christmas party, something that Torey wasn't usually in to but Joc had insisted. Torey had had a good time, and so did Joc. The next day they were sitting together wrapping presents as Joc talked about how big of a success the party was. During one of the silences Joc tells Torey that they should get married. This takes Torey by surprise, as she knew she wasn't ready to marry anyone and she had always known that she wasn't meant to marry Joc, but they were in a good place at the moment. When she hesitated to answer Joc becomes angry and tells Torey that her job has consumed her life and it is because of her kids that she won't get attached enough to anyone. He tells her that no one is going to want to be with someone who comes with an insane asylum. Even though Torey hadn't even been thinking about her classroom when he asked that question, and was hesitating because it was just a really big thing to think about, this only confirmed what she previously knew. Joc described being with her as being in a bed with two other people: Torey and her job. Torey tried to explain that it wasn't another person, and that her job was just a part of her, but Joc ended up leaving. He came back later in the evening to apologize, and told her that he knew they weren't going to end up together but he had to have at least tried.
I think this is an interesting thing to think about. It is important to think about what is important in the classroom but also how one's job is going to affect other parts of their life. Is it going to affect the people you are with: significant other, friends, family? If so, what sorts of sacrifices are we willing to make. Are we going to be with someone who isn't going to make us sacrifice something we are passionate about? These are all good questions to think about when it comes to having a career of any sort, let alone a teaching career where work always comes home.
I think this is an interesting thing to think about. It is important to think about what is important in the classroom but also how one's job is going to affect other parts of their life. Is it going to affect the people you are with: significant other, friends, family? If so, what sorts of sacrifices are we willing to make. Are we going to be with someone who isn't going to make us sacrifice something we are passionate about? These are all good questions to think about when it comes to having a career of any sort, let alone a teaching career where work always comes home.
Chapter 10
Torey decided to do a project with her students where they plant hyacinths in pots to put on their windowsill for the winter. Tomaso ends up getting frustrated with the project, first saying that he wanted to do his own to give to his father (who is no longer living), and ends up smashing the little pots. When Torey replaces the pots with milk cartons and finally gets the students back to work, Tomaso gets frustrated again and starts making mean comments to Torey about how stupid the project is and how it is her fault that it isn't working. He also tells Torey that if it were his father helping with the flowers, they would be turning out perfectly. This is where Torey makes a comment that she knew immediately after was inappropriate. She tells Tomaso, "Your dad really makes you angry doesn't he?". To this Tomaso immediately starts tearing up and runs out of the classroom. Torey ends up having to find a teacher aide to watch her classroom while she searched for Tomaso. She finally finds him in the auditorium backstage where they were storing old desks. He was in the back corner underneath all of them. Torey apologizes and tries to get Tomaso to come out, but he tells her that all she ever does is talk and never listens. When she listens to him, he tells her that he wants to kill himself because life is too hard (he is only 10 years old). He also talks about how everyone hates him. To this Torey tells him that Lori doesn't hate him, and he tells her that he doesn't hate Lori either. When he accuses Torey of hating him she tells him that she wishes she could find a way to tell him that she really cared about him so that he would believe her. Tomaso ends up crying again, and eventually comes out and hugs Torey.
This chapter was extremely emotional because Tomaso expresses his sadness with his life and the belief that everyone who has met him, hates him. Of course no one wants to be in this type of situation, hearing that a student/any person is so sad that they don't want to live anymore, but if I do have this situation come upon me I only hope I can handle it as well as Torey did, and to make the person feel like someone cares.
This chapter was extremely emotional because Tomaso expresses his sadness with his life and the belief that everyone who has met him, hates him. Of course no one wants to be in this type of situation, hearing that a student/any person is so sad that they don't want to live anymore, but if I do have this situation come upon me I only hope I can handle it as well as Torey did, and to make the person feel like someone cares.
Chapter 9
This chapter was split into 2 main parts, and they were definitely issues that were interesting and even hard to read about at times.
The first issue was a little more lighthearted: Santa Claus. Lori continued to talk about how she believed in Santa but her twin sister didn't, and asked if she was wrong for believing in him. The author discusses how she still has a hard time dealing with the topic of Santa Claus because there really is no 'good' answer to provide. I realized that if I were asked about Santa, I would feel the same way. If you say "no", you've destroyed dreams and a sentiment that makes others from all sorts of backgrounds really happy, especially around the holidays. If you say "yes", you're being dishonest. I really liked how it was handled in the book. Tomaso somewhat 'saved' Torey from having to answer, telling Lori that he still believed in Santa, and that there are things that many people, even adults, believe in that we never see. He then started talking about how he believed in Jesus and Mary, and prayed to them every night, but had never actually seen them. This was interesting to read about because it showed that through everything he had gone through, Tomaso still looked to people/things for faith. It was very touching.
The next part of the book was infuriating. Boo got hurt on the playground and had to be brought into the hospital. Torey and some other staff took met Boo's mother in the emergency room. When the doctor came to look at Boo, Torey had been the only person there. The doctor started getting frustrated when Boo would not respond to him. He even asked Torey if the child was 'psychotic'. When Torey said they were guessing he was autistic, the doctor started talking about 'what a waste' it was because Boo was a good-looking child. When Boo's mother came back into the room, the doctor and nurse put restraints on Boo, and started taking out a needle and thread. No anesthetics or anything. Boo's mother didn't say ANYTHING and just whimpered timidly. When Torey asked the doctor why he wasn't using anything he told her, "You know he doesn't really feel it. These people, they have no true feelings. Only what they imagine. No point in wasting good medicine on them." Well, Torey ended up getting kicked out of the room for getting so mad at the doctor, and reading this part made me really angry as well. It is amazing how students with disabilities used to be treated and I cannot imagine having to watch while that was being done to another human being.
I am very thankful that we have improved how we treat ALL of our students, and this chapter opened my eyes to the fact that they used to be treated basically like non-humans.
The first issue was a little more lighthearted: Santa Claus. Lori continued to talk about how she believed in Santa but her twin sister didn't, and asked if she was wrong for believing in him. The author discusses how she still has a hard time dealing with the topic of Santa Claus because there really is no 'good' answer to provide. I realized that if I were asked about Santa, I would feel the same way. If you say "no", you've destroyed dreams and a sentiment that makes others from all sorts of backgrounds really happy, especially around the holidays. If you say "yes", you're being dishonest. I really liked how it was handled in the book. Tomaso somewhat 'saved' Torey from having to answer, telling Lori that he still believed in Santa, and that there are things that many people, even adults, believe in that we never see. He then started talking about how he believed in Jesus and Mary, and prayed to them every night, but had never actually seen them. This was interesting to read about because it showed that through everything he had gone through, Tomaso still looked to people/things for faith. It was very touching.
The next part of the book was infuriating. Boo got hurt on the playground and had to be brought into the hospital. Torey and some other staff took met Boo's mother in the emergency room. When the doctor came to look at Boo, Torey had been the only person there. The doctor started getting frustrated when Boo would not respond to him. He even asked Torey if the child was 'psychotic'. When Torey said they were guessing he was autistic, the doctor started talking about 'what a waste' it was because Boo was a good-looking child. When Boo's mother came back into the room, the doctor and nurse put restraints on Boo, and started taking out a needle and thread. No anesthetics or anything. Boo's mother didn't say ANYTHING and just whimpered timidly. When Torey asked the doctor why he wasn't using anything he told her, "You know he doesn't really feel it. These people, they have no true feelings. Only what they imagine. No point in wasting good medicine on them." Well, Torey ended up getting kicked out of the room for getting so mad at the doctor, and reading this part made me really angry as well. It is amazing how students with disabilities used to be treated and I cannot imagine having to watch while that was being done to another human being.
I am very thankful that we have improved how we treat ALL of our students, and this chapter opened my eyes to the fact that they used to be treated basically like non-humans.
Chapter 8
This chapter describes some of the many struggles Torey faced when dealing with Tomaso. She basically lists all of the things he did in order to try and drive the teacher crazy. One of the things that stood out to me was the fact that he actually affected some things she did with the words he said. Tomaso would always tell Torey how bad her breath smelled, and for this reason she started brushing her teeth all the time, bringing mouthwash to school, and covering her mouth when talking to people. She finally realized much later that Tomaso said this to a lot of adults, and that she had probably been worrying for nothing.
The only person who seemed to be making some sort of connection with Tomaso was Lori. Torey attributed this to the fact that Lori had been open with Tomaso about her experiences, plus she did not show fear around him like most other children had in his past. Tomaso actually talked to Lori without using too vulgar of language, and was interested in what she had to say.
Torey eventually grew to love Tomaso and feel like she was lucky to have him. She said something at the end of the chapter that I thought was really interesting. It was, "I loved Tomaso's scandalous approach to life, his outrageous ability to hang on in a world that had been anything but kind to him, and indeed even to extract a few laughs from it....In the beginning I had thought only anger lived there, but I had grown to know fear was really the master and anger only the slave." (pg 89). It is amazing to hear how the author is able to open her arms and really accept anyone that comes into her unique little classroom.
The only person who seemed to be making some sort of connection with Tomaso was Lori. Torey attributed this to the fact that Lori had been open with Tomaso about her experiences, plus she did not show fear around him like most other children had in his past. Tomaso actually talked to Lori without using too vulgar of language, and was interested in what she had to say.
Torey eventually grew to love Tomaso and feel like she was lucky to have him. She said something at the end of the chapter that I thought was really interesting. It was, "I loved Tomaso's scandalous approach to life, his outrageous ability to hang on in a world that had been anything but kind to him, and indeed even to extract a few laughs from it....In the beginning I had thought only anger lived there, but I had grown to know fear was really the master and anger only the slave." (pg 89). It is amazing to hear how the author is able to open her arms and really accept anyone that comes into her unique little classroom.
Chapter 7
Chapter 7 introduced us to a new character, Tomaso. Tomaso is a new student in Torey's classroom who has an abundance of behavior issues. He is a "migrant child" who has been moving from foster home to foster home and has had a very unstable academic career. At one school he was enrolled in 3rd grade, then in 2nd grade at another school, and so on. He is very disruptive for Torey, Boo, and Lori as he seems to try to make people mad. Something he said in this chapter that really stood out was when he was trying to provoke Torey with little to no success. Tomaso said, "What's the matter with you? Why don't you go ahead and hate me like everybody else does? What makes you think you're so special?" This gave a lot of insight as to why he acts the way he does, being that he feels like everyone hates him so that's the kind of attention he is used to and needs. Since he never gets positive attention, he will try to provoke any kind of attention, even if it is negative.
Something else that came into play was Tomaso's family history. In this chapter Tomaso said, "I don't really belong in a class like this. My real father, he'll come get me pretty soon. He knows I'm waiting." When he originally said this there was already a realization that Tomaso came from a broken family and that there was some sort of abandonment by the father. When Torey actually went through his file, she found out that his father had been FATALLY shot by his stepmother and that Tomaso WITNESSED it happen. This was a huge shock to me as I was reading because I could not imagine what it would be like to have to deal with a situation like that: A child in denial about his own father's death.
Tomaso is very unkind to everyone in the classroom, but when Lori volunteers certain information about himself he starts to 'somewhat' come around. Lori tells Tomaso that she too was in a foster home. When he asked why she told him that it was probably because her parents were just sick of having her. This interests Tomaso and he asks how she knew, to which she responded, "I just did." After this conversation Tomaso tapes of Lori's folder that he had previously ripped apart, and tells her that she looks "a little Spanish". Lori says she doesn't think so, but Tomaso insists. I really enjoyed this part because Tomaso uses his ethnicity to separate himself from people, and as soon as he figured out that he was able to relate to someone, he was going to attribute it to the fact that they must have something else in common with him too (in this case, being Spanish).
This chapter probably brought about the most emotional story. Of course they are all very emotional, but Tomaso's background is so traumatizing it makes my heart break for him and for any other children who have behavioral issues but are judged because people don't know their story.
Something else that came into play was Tomaso's family history. In this chapter Tomaso said, "I don't really belong in a class like this. My real father, he'll come get me pretty soon. He knows I'm waiting." When he originally said this there was already a realization that Tomaso came from a broken family and that there was some sort of abandonment by the father. When Torey actually went through his file, she found out that his father had been FATALLY shot by his stepmother and that Tomaso WITNESSED it happen. This was a huge shock to me as I was reading because I could not imagine what it would be like to have to deal with a situation like that: A child in denial about his own father's death.
Tomaso is very unkind to everyone in the classroom, but when Lori volunteers certain information about himself he starts to 'somewhat' come around. Lori tells Tomaso that she too was in a foster home. When he asked why she told him that it was probably because her parents were just sick of having her. This interests Tomaso and he asks how she knew, to which she responded, "I just did." After this conversation Tomaso tapes of Lori's folder that he had previously ripped apart, and tells her that she looks "a little Spanish". Lori says she doesn't think so, but Tomaso insists. I really enjoyed this part because Tomaso uses his ethnicity to separate himself from people, and as soon as he figured out that he was able to relate to someone, he was going to attribute it to the fact that they must have something else in common with him too (in this case, being Spanish).
This chapter probably brought about the most emotional story. Of course they are all very emotional, but Tomaso's background is so traumatizing it makes my heart break for him and for any other children who have behavioral issues but are judged because people don't know their story.
Tuesday, November 20, 2012
Chapter 6
Chapter 6 reveals some much anticipated background information about Boo. Torey finally gets to talk with his mother, Mrs. Franklin, who until that conference was always seeming to avoid Torey. When they talked, Torey found out how scared Mrs. Franklin was that someone was going to come and take Boo away from her. She said that it was because her husband told her someone would if Boo couldn't learn to talk right, and that someone would take him to an insane asylum. Mrs. Franklin and her husband had fought a long battle with Boo, and originally their physician told them that Boo was just going through a stage. Through infancy, Boo was somewhat delayed but did learn many things at a fairly normal rate. Once he turned three, their doctor still insisted he was just going through a phase, but when they enrolled him into a preschool someone immediately recognized his symptoms to be that of autism. They traveled all over and went broke trying to figure out how to help Boo by enrolling him in all sorts of schools/programs who all had different philosophies, all of which failed. This was heartbreaking for Torey because she hated to hear about people who did nothing wrong and had such difficult situations placed upon them. Reading this part made me feel sad as well, and it really makes one realize how even those with the best intentions can end up on difficult times. When it is all said and done, Mr. and Mrs. Franklin still loved Boo, but they were just so sad, scared, and frustrated because they felt helpless when it came to helping him. A quote that really resonated with me was when Mrs. Franklin was talking about her sister's son in comparison to hers, and the huge difference in goals one can have based on circumstances. She said, "My sister has a little boy just four months younger than Boothie. She always writes me about what Merlin is doing. He's in second grade. He got picked to sing in the children's choir at church. And all I want is for Boothe to call me mama."
The next part of the chapter took place around Halloween. Lori was supposed to spend the second half of the day in her normal classroom because they were all going to wear costumes and celebrate. She ended up running into Torey's room part way through because a boy told her she was "the retardedest girl in the whole school". She then asked Torey if she was, because she had flunked kindergarten and said she was probably going to flunk first grade. Torey told Lori that there is nothing wrong with her. I definitely think this is a very difficult and fragile situation that I imagine I will have to deal with in some form or another. I've already heard kids in my practicum hours/other experiences with children who tell everyone that they are stupid, because they don't want the children to get their hopes up for any success being brought about by that child. I have also seen children many times call OTHER students stupid and tell them that they can't do things that 'normal' people can do. These situations make me really upset and sad, and are often difficult to deal with.
The next part of the chapter took place around Halloween. Lori was supposed to spend the second half of the day in her normal classroom because they were all going to wear costumes and celebrate. She ended up running into Torey's room part way through because a boy told her she was "the retardedest girl in the whole school". She then asked Torey if she was, because she had flunked kindergarten and said she was probably going to flunk first grade. Torey told Lori that there is nothing wrong with her. I definitely think this is a very difficult and fragile situation that I imagine I will have to deal with in some form or another. I've already heard kids in my practicum hours/other experiences with children who tell everyone that they are stupid, because they don't want the children to get their hopes up for any success being brought about by that child. I have also seen children many times call OTHER students stupid and tell them that they can't do things that 'normal' people can do. These situations make me really upset and sad, and are often difficult to deal with.
Monday, November 19, 2012
Chapter 5
This chapter was interesting in that the narrator started off talking about her personal life rather than her work life. She discussed the relationship she had with what I assume to be an ex-boyfriend Joc. Torey talks about how she and Joc are actually very different but that they seemed to work out okay. On the other hand, he was starting to get very frustrated with her because she couldn't seem to "leave her work at home." The incident she recalls happened when a friend and teacher gave her an idea for making ice cream with students in class. Rather than go out to dinner with Joc, Torey tells him she wants to stay in and try the idea. He becomes very frustrated with this and does not understand why Torey is so absorbed in the lives of these kids. They end up going out, but she hints that Joc was not "the one" for her because of his failure to understand her passion.
The next day Torey is trying to organize the materials to make ice cream with Lori and Boo. Things start off shaky as Boo takes the mixing bowl and puts it on his head and runs around the room. When they finally get the bowl away from Boo, Lori puts cream in the bowl and decides she is strong enough to bring the mixture over to the center table. Torey tells her not to and to just wait until she is ready to help, but Lori insists and continues to bring the bowl over. She ends up dropping the bowl, which smashes into pieces, leaving the heavy cream to spill all over Lori as well as the floor. This ends up being a scary moment for Torey, because when she goes to talk to Lori, Lori keeps repeating the same phrases "I didn't mean to", "I'm sorry", and "Are you gonna wup me?" over and over. It seems as though Lori is not speaking to Torey, but to someone else. Torey never finds out if this is a seizure or a psychotic episode, but it is one of the scarier moments in her career.
This chapter brought about two very different but important situations to think about. Going back to the Joc situation, I think it is important for me to be with someone who would understand my compassion for students, and have the understanding that as a teacher my work is never REALLY done at the end of the day when I leave the building.
This chapter also made me a little nervous for scary situations which I'm sure all teachers have to face at one point or another, varying in how extreme of course. I hope that I will be able to have the resources and support to handle a situation where I am concerned about the physical/mental health of a student.
The next day Torey is trying to organize the materials to make ice cream with Lori and Boo. Things start off shaky as Boo takes the mixing bowl and puts it on his head and runs around the room. When they finally get the bowl away from Boo, Lori puts cream in the bowl and decides she is strong enough to bring the mixture over to the center table. Torey tells her not to and to just wait until she is ready to help, but Lori insists and continues to bring the bowl over. She ends up dropping the bowl, which smashes into pieces, leaving the heavy cream to spill all over Lori as well as the floor. This ends up being a scary moment for Torey, because when she goes to talk to Lori, Lori keeps repeating the same phrases "I didn't mean to", "I'm sorry", and "Are you gonna wup me?" over and over. It seems as though Lori is not speaking to Torey, but to someone else. Torey never finds out if this is a seizure or a psychotic episode, but it is one of the scarier moments in her career.
This chapter brought about two very different but important situations to think about. Going back to the Joc situation, I think it is important for me to be with someone who would understand my compassion for students, and have the understanding that as a teacher my work is never REALLY done at the end of the day when I leave the building.
This chapter also made me a little nervous for scary situations which I'm sure all teachers have to face at one point or another, varying in how extreme of course. I hope that I will be able to have the resources and support to handle a situation where I am concerned about the physical/mental health of a student.
Sunday, November 18, 2012
Chapter 4
Chapter 4 focused a lot on Lori again, and delved further into her back story. Now Lori is in Torey's classroom half-days because of conflicts with her classroom teacher so Torey is able to meet with Lori's father on a more regular basis and learn more about her history. Mr. Sjokheim (Lori's adoptive father) has had a very sad past. He and his wife had a child, who due to a freak accident had such severe brain damage that she was on life support for months, and eventually died. When he and his wife decided to move somewhere new and start over, they had Lori and Libby, the twins, as foster children. They decided to adopt the twins, and soon after Mrs. Sjokheim became ill with cancer. She died a year after the twins had been adopted. He also talked about how Lori was born prematurely and how this may have somewhat affected her learning, but that she also had lesions in her skull from abuse in her previous home.
This chapter really brought out thoughts about not only dealing with children from abusive situations but those situations in general. It is so sad to think about how unstable one really has to be in order to even think about abusing someone else, let alone a small child. Thinking about it really makes me sick, and I hope as a future educator I can help those who have been abused see the light, and to educate everyone on all kinds of abuse.
A quote I really liked from this chapter was at the very end, because it really summed up nicely what I have thought about children coming from unfortunate circumstances who have a lot of difficulties. Torey said:
"I could not imagine what it must be like to be seven and to have known failure half my life, to get up every morning and come spend six hours in a place where try as I might, I could never really succeed. And by law Lori had at least seven more years ahead of her of this torture, as many years left as she lived. Men murdered and received shorter prison terms than that. All Lori had done was to be born into the wrong family."
As a future teacher, it is my hope that I can make school a safe and positive environment for all of my students. I understand that school is not necessarily always FUN for everyone, but I want to do my best to help students who struggle to not feel like they are being punished.
This chapter really brought out thoughts about not only dealing with children from abusive situations but those situations in general. It is so sad to think about how unstable one really has to be in order to even think about abusing someone else, let alone a small child. Thinking about it really makes me sick, and I hope as a future educator I can help those who have been abused see the light, and to educate everyone on all kinds of abuse.
A quote I really liked from this chapter was at the very end, because it really summed up nicely what I have thought about children coming from unfortunate circumstances who have a lot of difficulties. Torey said:
"I could not imagine what it must be like to be seven and to have known failure half my life, to get up every morning and come spend six hours in a place where try as I might, I could never really succeed. And by law Lori had at least seven more years ahead of her of this torture, as many years left as she lived. Men murdered and received shorter prison terms than that. All Lori had done was to be born into the wrong family."
As a future teacher, it is my hope that I can make school a safe and positive environment for all of my students. I understand that school is not necessarily always FUN for everyone, but I want to do my best to help students who struggle to not feel like they are being punished.
Chapter 3
This chapter brought up a very interesting issue. In the beginning Torey talks about how the school she is currently at is promoting a new reading program. The program seems great to all the adults, but that is BECAUSE they are adults. The books really aren't realistically helpful for children, and the adults buy them because they are catering to more adult audience and have higher level vocabulary than what would be used for elementary-aged children. Since Torey usually works with the younger or failing students, she immediately noticed that these books were not only NOT helping the students, but were taking shots at their self esteem. When asking the publishers of the book about these problems, they told her that the students were actually exactly where they should be, which really angered Torey, because it would only make sense for students to understand that if they are not reading at their "grade level" then they are not where they need to be. One quote I liked from this part was:
"And of course nothing could ever be said to these children who were reading fourth-grade books in sixth that would convince them that they were anything other than stupid. It was nothing more than statistics to the publishing company. For the kids it was life. That was such a bitterly high price to pay for an aesthetically pleasing book."
Reading this really made me think about the content of books in schools and who they are really aimed at helping. Although t his book was written almost thirty years ago and I strongly believe that things have improved since then, it is still important to think about what is best for the students, rather than what is more interesting for the teacher to use.
This created a segue into the next part, which specifically talked about Lori again. Lori, who already has trouble in school, was having even more trouble with these new books. It did not help that her general education teacher did not believe that special education students should be in a 'normal' classroom and referred to them as 'slowies'. Her teacher, Edna Thorsen, also believed that Lori was only doing poorly because she was trying to act defiant towards to teacher, so it was more of a behavioral issue than a learning issue. Torey knew that this of course was not true. This part of the chapter was really sad to me because I cannot imagine having a teacher that did not believe in me and who openly stated that they didn't want me there. It would be so heartbreaking to be ANY age and to have to hear that, and feel like you couldn't do anything to make things better. Edna ends up making Lori stay in from recess when she doesn't finish her workbook pages correctly, rather than letting her go to Torey for help later on in the day. When Lori continues to struggle, Edna decides to keep her after school. One day Lori has an outburst in class out of frustration, and is sent to the principal's office for a 'paddling'. When Torey hears of this, she immediately walks to the office and asks if she can take Lori into her classroom for the rest of the day.
It is unbelievable the an adult can know so many of the circumstance of a child: sexual/physical abuse, brain injuries, pre-natal issues, etc. and still be so heartless and misunderstanding of a child. Reading things like this make it more clear to me that it is extremely important to try to gather all of the facts before making assumptions of my students.
"And of course nothing could ever be said to these children who were reading fourth-grade books in sixth that would convince them that they were anything other than stupid. It was nothing more than statistics to the publishing company. For the kids it was life. That was such a bitterly high price to pay for an aesthetically pleasing book."
Reading this really made me think about the content of books in schools and who they are really aimed at helping. Although t his book was written almost thirty years ago and I strongly believe that things have improved since then, it is still important to think about what is best for the students, rather than what is more interesting for the teacher to use.
This created a segue into the next part, which specifically talked about Lori again. Lori, who already has trouble in school, was having even more trouble with these new books. It did not help that her general education teacher did not believe that special education students should be in a 'normal' classroom and referred to them as 'slowies'. Her teacher, Edna Thorsen, also believed that Lori was only doing poorly because she was trying to act defiant towards to teacher, so it was more of a behavioral issue than a learning issue. Torey knew that this of course was not true. This part of the chapter was really sad to me because I cannot imagine having a teacher that did not believe in me and who openly stated that they didn't want me there. It would be so heartbreaking to be ANY age and to have to hear that, and feel like you couldn't do anything to make things better. Edna ends up making Lori stay in from recess when she doesn't finish her workbook pages correctly, rather than letting her go to Torey for help later on in the day. When Lori continues to struggle, Edna decides to keep her after school. One day Lori has an outburst in class out of frustration, and is sent to the principal's office for a 'paddling'. When Torey hears of this, she immediately walks to the office and asks if she can take Lori into her classroom for the rest of the day.
It is unbelievable the an adult can know so many of the circumstance of a child: sexual/physical abuse, brain injuries, pre-natal issues, etc. and still be so heartless and misunderstanding of a child. Reading things like this make it more clear to me that it is extremely important to try to gather all of the facts before making assumptions of my students.
Chapter 2
This chapter talks about what happens when Boo has run out of the classroom. He ends up running all the way to a kindergarten classroom and hides under a rug. By the time Torey finds him, the kindergarten class is coming back from recess and are wondering what he is doing. Torey calmly picks up Boo, now not struggling, and tells the students that he wanted to see what was under the rug. When she brings him back a student named Lori is waiting for her in the resource room. Lori is adopted, and was previously abused in her home beforehand. She is also a twin who did not receive as much nourishment/oxygen as her sister, so she has been left with learning disabilities. These disabilities aside, she is a very smart and caring girl.
It was really interesting to read about Lori, because your heart really breaks for her. Even though she is such bright and caring person, she just cannot learn very easily. Part of this is also attributed to the fact that when she was abused, her skull was fractured and a piece of bone was pushed into her brain. Something the author mentioned about Torey which crosses over to a lot of different cases with students was that, "For all intents and purposes, Lori was normal. Because of this, I noticed that people, myself included, tended to forget she was not. And sometimes we became angry with her for things over which she had no control." I really liked this quote because I think as an educator one has to realize that even the students who don't show their disabilities socially or in every day tasks, we still have to remember the things they do struggle with and try not to become frustrated when they cannot do things that other students can.
The chapter ended focusing on Boo again, who finally started to talk. He did not speak directly to anyone, or about anything relevant. What he DID do was recite word-for-word the morning weather. Torey called this "delayed echolalia". I thought this was very interesting because when I coached tennis this summer there was an autistic boy who would do something similar, except not delayed. He would repeat each direction I told him over and over. To end the chapter this way sent a very strong message about the quantity of information children with autism really can retain, which gives one hope when thinking about what they are capable of in a school setting.
It was really interesting to read about Lori, because your heart really breaks for her. Even though she is such bright and caring person, she just cannot learn very easily. Part of this is also attributed to the fact that when she was abused, her skull was fractured and a piece of bone was pushed into her brain. Something the author mentioned about Torey which crosses over to a lot of different cases with students was that, "For all intents and purposes, Lori was normal. Because of this, I noticed that people, myself included, tended to forget she was not. And sometimes we became angry with her for things over which she had no control." I really liked this quote because I think as an educator one has to realize that even the students who don't show their disabilities socially or in every day tasks, we still have to remember the things they do struggle with and try not to become frustrated when they cannot do things that other students can.
The chapter ended focusing on Boo again, who finally started to talk. He did not speak directly to anyone, or about anything relevant. What he DID do was recite word-for-word the morning weather. Torey called this "delayed echolalia". I thought this was very interesting because when I coached tennis this summer there was an autistic boy who would do something similar, except not delayed. He would repeat each direction I told him over and over. To end the chapter this way sent a very strong message about the quantity of information children with autism really can retain, which gives one hope when thinking about what they are capable of in a school setting.
Thursday, November 8, 2012
Chapter 1
For my EDUC 250 class (Educating Exceptional Students) ability project I have chosen to read a book and blog all the while. As the title of this blog suggests, the book I chose is titled Somebody Else's Kids by Torey L. Hayden. Before picking it from the list I really had no idea what to expect, other than that it would have something to do with a student with an exceptionality.
The first chapter opens with the narrator talking about the 'vacuum'. The vacuum they speak of has to do with the process of mainstreaming students into the classroom who were previously in self-contained special education rooms. As I read further, I came to find out that the narrator's name is Torey (the author), and she was the teacher of a self-contained special education classroom until Public Law 94-142, which we have discussed in class, was passed. After that, the children in her classroom were sent to general education rooms, and she was sent to work as a resource teacher in another school across town.
Two years later, the director of special education in the district asks Torey if she would be willing to take on a student that has been driving his general education teacher crazy. His name is Booth, or "Boo" as they refer to him in the book, and he is assumed to be autistic. He is seven years old and still in a half day kindergarten classroom (at the school she PREVIOUSLY) taught at. Torey was nervous to take on the task at first because her new room was not really equipped for that type of teaching anymore, but she decided to agree to the task.
The first day Boo comes to class she has a hard time getting him to do things as soon as he gets into the classroom. His mother had barely said anything to him before she left, which I found really sad being that he is already a student who needs extra help and now he is being put into a totally new and possibly scary situation. Boo tends to repeat the things Torey says straight back to him, without actually doing any of the things she is asking. Suddenly, Boo starts screaming and eventually runs out of the classroom. This is where Chapter 1 ends.
I am already extremely interested in this story. It is much more interesting to hear a first person narrative of a situation than reading it in a textbook. Real life experiences in my opinion are the best tools for learning. That being said, I cannot imagine the stress I would feel if on my first day with a student in a somewhat new situation for me, the student started screaming and ran out of the classroom! I can't even think about how scared I would be of every bad thing that could possibly happen. It was very interesting for me to read about how Boo acts (repeating things softly, etc.) because one summer while I was teaching tennis to elementary students, there was a boy with autism who did the exact same thing. Luckily we didn't have any incidents, but we did have to make some accommodations for his learning.
I cannot wait to read the rest of this book!
The first chapter opens with the narrator talking about the 'vacuum'. The vacuum they speak of has to do with the process of mainstreaming students into the classroom who were previously in self-contained special education rooms. As I read further, I came to find out that the narrator's name is Torey (the author), and she was the teacher of a self-contained special education classroom until Public Law 94-142, which we have discussed in class, was passed. After that, the children in her classroom were sent to general education rooms, and she was sent to work as a resource teacher in another school across town.
Two years later, the director of special education in the district asks Torey if she would be willing to take on a student that has been driving his general education teacher crazy. His name is Booth, or "Boo" as they refer to him in the book, and he is assumed to be autistic. He is seven years old and still in a half day kindergarten classroom (at the school she PREVIOUSLY) taught at. Torey was nervous to take on the task at first because her new room was not really equipped for that type of teaching anymore, but she decided to agree to the task.
The first day Boo comes to class she has a hard time getting him to do things as soon as he gets into the classroom. His mother had barely said anything to him before she left, which I found really sad being that he is already a student who needs extra help and now he is being put into a totally new and possibly scary situation. Boo tends to repeat the things Torey says straight back to him, without actually doing any of the things she is asking. Suddenly, Boo starts screaming and eventually runs out of the classroom. This is where Chapter 1 ends.
I am already extremely interested in this story. It is much more interesting to hear a first person narrative of a situation than reading it in a textbook. Real life experiences in my opinion are the best tools for learning. That being said, I cannot imagine the stress I would feel if on my first day with a student in a somewhat new situation for me, the student started screaming and ran out of the classroom! I can't even think about how scared I would be of every bad thing that could possibly happen. It was very interesting for me to read about how Boo acts (repeating things softly, etc.) because one summer while I was teaching tennis to elementary students, there was a boy with autism who did the exact same thing. Luckily we didn't have any incidents, but we did have to make some accommodations for his learning.
I cannot wait to read the rest of this book!
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